Jeffster Versus The Aquarius
by Aurora Lenore
Summary: Jeff and Lester's curiosity/obsession with the Buy More's newest employee will change both of their lives forever. IF they can survive knowing the truth. Rated T for mild sexual innuendos, occasional drug references and mild language. Reviews are welcome.
1. Chapter 1

**This is my first Chuck fan fiction story, so be gentle. DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the characters from CHUCK, but they do randomly visit my dreams and whisper random things in my ear. Thanks to Morgan for the reminder to buy more Oreos. I appreciate it.**

It was an incredibly slow day at the Burbank Buy More and the rare thunderstorm outside made the occasion even gloomier. But that wasn't what was making Lester Patel so melancholy. It was the activity taking place near the front of the store that was making him feel uneasy. Chuck Bartowski, head of the Nerd Herd, was helping a female customer. Lester and his best friend Jeff Barnes had tried to access her first, but the store's wretched assistant manager, Emmett Milbarge quickly blocked them off. Lester couldn't help but to stare at her, as Jeff did the same. She was wearing a camo green Gorillaz tank top, tight black jeans, with purple and black Nike shoes. But it wasn't her clothes that caught his attention. It was her tall, willowy frame, her light brown hair in its playful ponytail, her tan skin and her pouty bubblegum lips.

"What does Bartowski have that we don't?" Jeff snarled, reading Lester's thoughts perfectly.

"I often wonder the same thing, my friend. We have our good looks, our eloquent and seductive charm, amazing hair-" he stopped and glanced at Jeff's somewhat bald head. "Well, two out of three for you."

Suddenly, Chuck walked over to the Nerd Herd area, the beautiful specimen right beside him. "Jeff, Lester? This is Gloria Tipton. She's going to be working here at the Buy More."

That was all Lester needed. Smiling sexily, he looked her up and down. "Let's see some credentials."

"I'll show you _mine_ if you show me yours," Jeff chimed in.

"Guys, _easy_. Gloria and I went to high school together for a while. She just moved back here and I'd appreciate it if you didn't thoroughly creep her out before she even gets her uniform and locker," Chuck explained before turning to her. "If these guys give you any trouble-"

"Don't worry, Chuck. I can handle my own," she smiled and Lester's jaw dropped. Her voice was like nothing he had ever heard. Low and sexy, smooth as silk, her words slow and enunciated. It did not match her physical features at all, which aroused him even more.

"I know you can. I'm so glad you're here," Chuck replied, hugging her. "I'll get your stuff out of Big Mike's office."

"Did it hurt when you fell from Sexual Heaven?" Jeff asked.

Gloria wrinkled her nose. "You are a creepy version of Larry from the Three Stooges. And I have never been _fond_ of the Three Stooges."

For a moment, Jeff looked injured, but he quickly recovered. "So, Gloria; wanna see our high-definition room in the back? I can show you Where the Wild Things Are."

Lester rolled his eyes. "Don't mind Jeffrey. He's been hitting the sauce after lunchtime again. So, where exactly are you from and why have you chosen the Burbank Buy More as your... _calling_?"

Gloria opened her mouth to reply but Chuck reappeared, Nerd Herd uniform and badge in tow. "Here you go, Gloria. If you need anything, just ask myself or Morgan."

"And I have restraining orders for these two bozos for you to fill out anytime. In fact, they have their own file cabinet," a low, growling voice belonging to none other than John Casey retorted.

Gloria smiled. "I don't think that will be necessary but thank you for the suggestion. I'll be back in a bit."

And with that, she walked away, that gorgeous body all but blowing a proverbial raspberry at Lester. As he eyed Jeff and Casey, however, he could tell there might be some competition for her affections. And Lester loved competition.

* * *

 _What have I gotten myself into?_ Gloria asked herself as she buttoned the last button on her white blouse and adjusted her amethyst necklace. _Oh, yeah; you came back to Burbank to reunite with your friend from high school, only to get kidnapped because you are an idiot._ All she wanted to do was hang out with one of her few true friends from high school. She recalled how she and Chuck just connected. Not on a romantic plane, but more like family. She loved Chuck and his sister Ellie so much that she would pretend _they_ were her real family. But somehow, she ended up at the wrong place at the wrong time last week and nearly gotten herself killed. She was surprised that Chuck's girlfriend Sarah Walker and fellow Buy More employee John Casey showed up to save her ass, but when she saw Chuck Bartowski himself with them? She thought she was going insane. Turns out, her old chum was a spy, working with the CIA and the NSA. To keep her safe, Chuck had talked her into staying in plain sight, where they would be able to get to her quickly if she got into trouble. But working at the Buy More with this Jeff and Lester character was not what she had in mind. "I think I'd rather chance being kidnapped again," she told her reflection in the bathroom mirror before she exited the bathroom.

"I was wondering when the new estrogen would show up."

Gloria looked up to see a bespectacled and balding man in a manager's vest, sneering at her. Looking at his name tag, she read the name Emmett. "Excuse me," she quickly tried to walk past him, but he cut her off at the pass.

"I believe that would be, 'excuse me, _sir_ '."

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw John Casey walking towards her and she held back a sigh. She was _tired_ of being saved. She could handle this douchebag herself. "I'll let you know when I find someone worthy of being called 'sir'. But for now, I think Ass Man suits you perfectly," she smiled, venom spewing with each syllable before she stomped her foot down hard on his. "Toodles," she waved, enjoying seeing the look on Emmett's face as he hobbled around in immense pain.

As she walked away, she could have sworn she saw John Casey's permanent scowl turn up into a half smile.

"That idiot almost makes Jeff and Lester seem bearable. Almost," she whispered to herself as she prepared to face her new position at the Nerd Herd counter. She wasn't sure how she was going to handle being in an enclosed space with those two goons, but she would sure she could find some way to muddle through. She promised Chuck, after all. And she never broke a promise to her 'real' family.

* * *

"I can't believe you let her get away!"

"I was outnumbered, man; what the hell was I supposed to do?"

"I want that microchip, Faison! Now you don't stop until you have it and her!"

Faison ran a hand through his wavy auburn hair. "Yeah; okay. But she's being protected by the CIA, for cryin' out loud. It's not gonna be easy."

As soon as the last word left his mouth, he felt a rough hand around his neck, pinnng him to the wall. "Then I suggest you find a way," the man growled. "Because if you fail again, you won't like what I do to you."

Faison gasped for air and tried not to collapse as the man let go of his throat. "I'll get her," he wheezed. "Whatever it takes."

"Good man. You have chosen wisely."

As the man chuckled and left Faison's apartment, Faison quickly splashed water over his face. He wasn't sure what was on that microchip, but he knew for sure he wanted to live to see his thirty-fifth birthday next month. "Better enjoy your victory now, sweetheart," he whispered as he walked across the room and turned on his laptop's monitor. "Next time, you won't get away so easily."

He smiled as the monitor's image came into focus and the girl's face appeared in front of him, decked out in a white blouse, black pants and a Buy More name badge.


	2. Chapter 2

"Jeff? Jeff? _Jeffrey!_ "

Jeff turned around to see fellow Buy More employee Morgan Grimes and sighed. "Yeah?"

"Is there any way that you and Lester could _possibly_ leave Gloria alone? I mean, Chuck told me she's had a really hard time lately and even though she and I didn't always get along that great in school, I'd appreciate it if you did this as a favor to me for Chuck," Morgan rambled on, but all Jeff heard was a noise similar to the adults in the _Peanuts_ cartoons.

"Yeah, sure."

Morgan smiled. "Thanks, man. I really appreciate it. You're a good man."

Jeff smiled back as he took out his pocket camera and began snapping several photos of Gloria's butt as she walked down a nearby aisle.

"Jeff, I thought I asked very nicely for you to-" Morgan began.

"Grimes!" Big Mike's voice interrupted. "I need _you_ helping customers! We got three guys ready to torch the place if they don't find the new _Blink_ _182_ CD!"

"On it, boss," Morgan said with a sigh of his own as he walked away.

"And Barnes; get back to working on that computer and stop...being you!" Big Mike barked before walking off to enjoy his Subway sandwich.

Jeff rolled his eyes and went back to working on the computer he was supposed to have finished four hours and six breaks ago. But he knew there was no way he could focus. Not when _she_ was around. There was something about her that made him feel awkward yet oddly comfortable. He knew Lester had been following her all day, hiding behind various shelves and objects in the store. Hopefully he had found something to report back. Speaking of his best friend, where did he go?

"Jeffrey!"

Jeff cried out as Lester's face popped up on the other side of the counter in front of him. "Lester, don't do that! You know I have a spastic bladder."

"Forgive me, but I have got some information on our little Goddess of Mystery that is going to make the hairs on the back of your...back stand up. You ready for this?"

"Lay it on me."

Lester looked to the left and to the right before leaning in closer. "She was born in the month of _February_."

"February. I don't get it," Jeff replied after a few seconds.

" _February_ , Jeff. Meaning she is in the dawning of the age of Aquarius. _Meaning_ she is impulsive, eccentric, afraid to commit. So in theory, my friend, she is _perfect_."

"She told you all this?"

"Did she _tell_ me all this...of _course_ not! But she wears a necklace with an amethyst stone. And, given the fact that I am somewhat of a connoisseur when it comes to all things astrology, I can tap into these kinds of things. Also, I happened to read it online, but that is irrelevant."

Jeff nodded his approval. "Nice. Very nice." He looked over to where Gloria had been standing, however and he took note that Lester was right about one thing. The hairs on his back _did_ stand up. But it was only because John Casey was staring straight at him, a look on his face that made Jeff's spastic bladder have a field day.

* * *

Gloria slammed her locker shut in frustration and audibly growled. It had been a week-one whole week-of sheer hell. In between rude customers, Morgan accidentally spilling his drink on her, Casey glaring at every person who came into contact with her, Jeff and Lester's stalking and verbal innuendos, and Emmett Milbarge's bullying, she had enough. She couldn't wait to go home, take a shower, change into some comfortable clothes and invite Chuck over for some catching up.

"Oh, good. I'm glad I caught you," Casey said as he entered the breakroom. "Since you know about Chuck, Sarah and myself, you need to know that the three of us have to go away for a while. It shouldn't take us too long, but in the meantime, you don't need to be alone. Chuck wants you to go to his place tonight and stay with Ellie and Awesome. If there's an emergency, use this." He handed her a triangular keychain. "Just push the center with your fingerprint and it will activate an emergency signal. Got it?"

Gloria nodded sullenly. "Yeah. I got it. Thanks. Good luck on your mission."

Casey made a small grunt that she assumed was a 'thank you' and walked out without another word.

"You have _got_ to be _kidding_ me!" she cried out as soon as he was out of earshot, kicking the lockers before storming out, mentally daring anyone to look at her. As much as she loved Ellie and wanted to meet this 'Captain Awesome' Chuck had told her about, she just wanted to be with him and eat a gallon of rocky road ice cream while watching bad science-fiction flicks. Just like the old days.

She was still muttering under her breath when she got to her car and opened her purse to get her keys. At least she was going to leave this wretched store for the weekend. And she couldn't wait to give it the middle finger as she drove away. "Come on; where are my-?" she stopped suddenly, her mouth forming a small 'o' as she looked inside her car and saw her keys still dangling from the ignition. "No!" She banged on the window. "Could this evening get any worse?"

Apparently, the God of Sarcasm answered as rain began to pour down on her, mixing with the tears that streamed down her face before she leaned her head against the top of the car, sobbing and wishing she had never come back to California.

* * *

"Aw, man; it's _pouring_ out here!" Lester cried out as he and Jeff exited the store. They had been the last two to leave, except for Big Mike, whose little siesta in his office had branched out into possibly, as Morgan had put it, 'an all-night-post-Subway-coma-fest'.

"Hey, Lester; is that who I think it is out there?" Jeff pointed.

"Oh, mama-mia, it _is_! Come, Jeffrey; she is but a damsel in distress and we are but the white knights on noble steeds come to save the day!" Lester pulled the hood on his jacket over his head and quickly walked towards her. He said her name, but his voice was drowned out by a loud rumble of thunder. Mentally cursing Mother Nature, he carefully tapped her shoulder.

Gloria looked up and slowly turned around, her eyes puffy and red from crying, but within seconds, those same eyes narrowed into slits. "What do you two want?"

"Car won't start?" Jeff asked, loosening his tie.

"I-I locked my keys inside. I'll be fine. I can just w-walk," she sputtered and Lester noticed she was shivering.

"Nonsense; you'll do no such thing, milady. Jeff and I can drive you. Right, Jeffrey?" he asked, giving his friend a look that told him he had better agree.

"Right. We can take you wherever you need to go," Jeff grinned.

"I don't know where I want to go; I can't go back to my place because...it's being renovated and Chuck is out of town with Sarah. Maybe I should go back inside," she answered.

"No. You need to be someplace warm with a hot meal and get a good night's sleep," Lester told her before his eyes brightened. "Hey; I know! You can come and stay at my place while my m- _sister_ -is out of town for the weekend!"

"Your sister?" Jeff asked before Lester nudged Jeff's ribcage with his elbow. "Oh, yeah; your _sister_!"

Gloria took a step away from them. "No, thanks. I have had enough _fun_ for a while," she retorted.

"Ouch," Jeff said with a grimace.

"Please," Lester pressed, "just for tonight. Everything will be fine; you have my word. You need to get dry and-" he paused to let the butterflies settle, "-out of that wet uniform and into some dry clothes. In the morning, we'll take you to Chuck's house."

Gloria nodded after a few seconds. "Okay, but if I catch either of you spying on me or doing anything inappropriate, I'm calling a cab _pronto_."

"Right this way," Jeff ushered her. "Come and meet Loretta."

"Loretta?"

Lester fought the urge to drape his arm around her. "He named his van Loretta."

He looked at her as she got inside and his heart skipped a beat. Even with her hair and clothes soaking wet, her face red and mascara-stained, she looked beautiful. And he would do almost _anything_ to make her fall in love with him. Even if it meant attempting to be a perfect gentleman for the next twelve hours.


	3. Chapter 3

Chuck, Sarah and Casey had just finished receiving their latest instructions from the petite yet stern General Diane Beckman, when his phone rang. "It's Morgan," he announced before answering it. "Hey, buddy; did you call and check on Gloria for me?"

"Uh, yeah; that's actually what I'm calling about. I've got some good news and some bad news. Which do you want first? You know what? I'll just give you the good news first, otherwise the bad news might not make as much sense and-"

"Morgan!" Chuck stopped him. "You're rambling. What's the good news?"

"Well," Morgan began, taking a deep breath. "You told her you didn't think she should be alone cause she thought she saw a prowler or something outside where she's staying. So I called, just like you told me to and she is not alone."

"Okay, so then what's the bad news?"

"Are you sitting down? Cause you should probably be sitting down. See, I called Ellie first to check on Gloria and Ellie told me she's not there. So I called Gloria and she told me that she is with...Jeff and Lester. At Lester's _mom's_ house!"

Chuck grabbed the wall, which was the closest thing he could grasp. "Wait; she's with Jeff and _Lester_? How? Why?"

"She said she locked her keys in the car and Jeff and Lester offered to give her a ride in Jeff's Van of Horrors. She told me that Lester offered to let her stay with him. Something about rain and cold, yadda yadda. Chuck, you don't think she's on some sort of _drugs_ , do you? I mean, you haven't really talked to her much since school. Maybe she's not the same Gloria we used to know, ya know?" Morgan explained.

"Morgan, she's not on drugs. But if Jeff and Lester do anything-Jeff and Lester-like-to her, I am pretty sure she can hold her own. _That_ hasn't changed since high school," Chuck assured him. "Just text her and tell her to call me tomorrow. And thanks, Morgan."

"Hey; anytime buddy. You and Sarah have fun tonight. But not _too_ much fun. You know what I mean. Goodnight."

Chuck hung up the phone and turned back to Sarah and Casey.

Sarah matched his concerned face with a look of her own. "Is everything okay with your friend?"

Chuck grimaced. "I'm not sure, but I think she might be on drugs," he started before explaining what happened.

* * *

It had been a weird night. Possibly one of the weirdest in Jeff's entire life. While he and Lester were sitting in Lester's kitchen, a beautiful woman was seated on the sofa in the next room, drinking hot cocoa with an afghan blanket around her. Jeff recalled how Lester found a pair of his mom's yoga pants and a black baby doll tee that read _I Shot J.R._ in glitter and was able to pass them off as his "sister's clothes". Jeff was surprised that Gloria took them to wear since they were dry, and even more surprised that they fit her pretty well. It was the first time Jeff had experienced _anything_ like this completely-or even partially-sober.

"So, did you notice how she was taking everything in when we entered? I've seen that look before, compadre. She was _casing_ the place. Looking for expensive trinkets to steal and then pawn off while we sleep. I'm telling you, Jeff; I may find her aesthetically pleasing to the point that my loins shake, but she is nothing but a thief; I am _sure_ of it," Lester whispered from across the table where they sat.

"So what should we _do_? Are you sure she's a thief? She's got the biceps and calves of someone who works for the fuzz. Trust me, I know. I think she's working undercover."

Lester raised his eyebrow at him. "You really think so? Do you think she's going to bust us for that unpaid parking ticket you got back in two-thousand?"

Jeff felt a bead of sweat form on his forehead. "I can't go to prison, Lester. I am _highly_ allergic to orange polyester."

Lester gave him a sympathetic look. "I understand. Don't worry; I still say she is but a common thief. And I know how to prove it. All we have to do is get my shoebox full of those counterfeit bills from my favorite mail-order catalog, place some in _your_ wallet and then nonchalantly leave it lying where she will have to see it. No thief will be able to resist. Then we'll set up a hidden camera to catch her in the act. As soon as she grabs the money, we'll know it and she'll be caught. She'll be at our _mercy_!"

Jeff smiled. "Yeah. I like that plan. Especially the being at our mercy part. I've always wanted to have someone be willing to do anything. The possibilities are endless."

"Indeed they are, my friend. Indeed they are."

* * *

"What is it? Why are you calling me at this hour?"

Faison swallowed hard. He didn't want to tell him the real reason, but it was too late to turn back now. "Boss, we may have a problem with the girl. It seems we might not be the only ones interested in her. Two guys took her after her shift and it seems they are watching her every move, as well. I saw them setting up video surveillance equipment."

There was a loud growl on the other end. A growl that told Faison it was a good thing he wasn't within reaching distance. "You idiot! Why couldn't you have _followed_ them? Surely we are the only ones who want that microchip! You had better not screw this up. Watch them. Watch them closely. At the first sign of them leaving with her, you had better make sure you do whatever it takes to scare them away. I want that girl, Faison. And you had better deliver her to me. Do I make myself clear?"

"Crystal, boss. I'll make sure those guys are out of the picture."

"Good. And don't call me again until you have her!"

Faison jumped as he slammed down the phone in his ear. "He still has a _landline_?" he said aloud before turning back to the monitors. With a few clicks on the laptop keyboard, he was able to see through the same lens as her other kidnappers' camera. He watched as she sat up and picked up something that was lying on the floor. Faison zoomed in and saw it was a wallet. Fascinated, he grabbed a bag of potato chips and continued watching. She had opened the wallet now and a long accordion photo holder extended, revealing multiple photos of women's cleavage.

"Oh my Lord," he heard her mutter, carefully refolding the soft porn imagery. He watched as she was just about to close the wallet completely, but something caught her eye. He tried to zoom in, but could only see a faded image of a woman with light hair. "What the hell?" she whispered. "Why on Earth would he have _this_?"

"I'm on the edge of my seat, woman; what is it?" Faison asked, wiping his greasy hands on his pants.

"I don't know that I really _want_ to know," she sighed, closing the wallet and placing it on the table before heading back to the sofa and lying down.

"Aw, _man_!" Faison whined. "Well, I gotta get some sleep to if I wanna catch those guys before they leave with the boss' prize." He just hoped whatever his boss wanted was worth the trouble.

* * *

 _Gloria closed her eyes, but she could still hear the crackling and popping of the wood around her and feel the flames coming closer. She hadn't meant to knock the candle over, but as she watched the wax fall into the curtains, she knew she was going to be in serious trouble. "Help!" she screamed, tears rolling down her cheeks. She was going to die and no one would even hear her._

 _"H-hello?" a young male voice called out and Gloria's heart caught in her throat. Was she hearing things?_

 _"Please, help me!" she sobbed. "I'm so scared!"_

 _Suddenly, a young boy's face appeared and she recognized him from her class. Was his name Clark? Chester?_

 _"It's me, Chuck," the boy told her through the smoke. "Take my hand!"_

 _"I-I can't! I'm too scared!" Gloria cried, her back against the wall. She hated that her fear had frozen her in place, but as the smoke became thicker, so did the possibility that she wouldn't make it._

 _"Please! We don't have much time," Chuck told her, extending his arm. "You have to take my hand. I won't let go, I promise."_

 _Gloria screamed as part of the ceiling collapsed around her. It was too late. She would die alone, never finding where she truly belonged..._

Gloria jolted awake with a strangled cry, sitting up and pressing her hand to her heart. She was still at Lester's house, but her stupid nightmare had followed her. There was only one thing that always seemed to calm her down after waking up from the night terror that haunted her all those years: she needed to work.

Jumping up and entering the kitchen, she concentrated on locating the ingredients she needed to make breakfast. As creepy and awkward as Jeff and Lester were, she needed to thank them for actually being hospitable and strangely helpful.

It only took about twenty minutes for Jeff and Lester to walk in, rubbing the sleep from their eyes. "Guys, I made-" she began, turning around to see them but quickly turning right back again. "Jeff! Please put some pants on. And a shirt!"

"Oh yeah. I forgot; we have a lady present," Jeff said, scratching himself in his briefs before heading back to the bedroom.

Gloria turned back around and bit her lip as she glanced at Lester. "Nice pajamas. Blue's a good color on you."

Lester gave her an intimate smile in his royal blue satin jammies. "You should know. You were in my dreams all night."

"And so it begins," she sighed. "Can you just not talk and drink your coffee while I finish the eggs?"

Lester sat at the table, where a mug of steaming hot coffee awaited him. "Do you always make breakfast the morning after?"

Gloria silently praised the heavens above as Jeff reappeared, fully clothed. "It's my way of saying thanks for helping me. After we eat, I'll stick your sister's clothes in the wash so she'll never know I borrowed them."

Lester looked at Gloria longer than she felt comfortable. "Nah, keep 'em. My...sister will never know they're gone. Besides, now that you have worn them, they just won't-look the same-when she wears them."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive," both Lester and Jeff replied in unison.

"O-kay," she replied slowly before bringing them their plates of waffles, eggs and hash browns.

Gloria watched with satisfaction and a bit of fear as they hungrily gobbled down the food with an occasional pleasurable moan. When they had finished, Gloria cleared her throat. "Um, Jeff; you dropped your wallet last night. I put it on the table in the living room. And as you boys saw from your little video camera, I didn't take one bill of the fake _or_ real money."

Lester nearly choked on his coffee. "Whaaat? Come on, girl, you must be paranoid. We wouldn't do something like...okay, so we _would_ and we did. How did you know?"

Gloria wrinkled her nose playfully before turning to Jeff. "But Jeff, I _do_ have a question to ask you. A serious one."

"Whatever it is, the answer is yes I will and no, pain doesn't bother me," Jeff replied instantly.

"Ew. No, it's not that kind of question. I want to know why you have a photo of my mother in your wallet?" Gloria asked, pulling a photo of a light-haired woman wearing a prison jumpsuit from the waistband of Lester's mom's yoga pants.

Suddenly, Jeff and Lester snapped their heads up, looking at the photo, each other and finally at Gloria, wide-eyed.

" _Your_ mother?!"


	4. Chapter 4

**Note: Had to delay Chapter 4 due to illness and struggling with these scenes. But I want to personally thank those of you who have left reviews. I appreciate them more than you could know. Now, on to the adventure!**

"I'm sorry, but there is no logical reason on Earth that the same woman who sired Jeff here gave birth to you, as well. It's impossible, improbable and-" Lester began to explain as Gloria got up, walked over to her purse and sat back down. He then saw her slap a photograph on the table; practically the exact same photo of the exact same woman. "Oh my God, she's your _mother_?" he concluded, eyes wide and mouth ajar.

"Yeah, jerkface; that's _exactly_ what I said!" Gloria barked before picking back up the photo and reading some writing on the back. "To my Gloria. With love, Mama."

Lester thought his head would literally explode with this new information. How is it that the new woman in town-Chuck's high school chum-would be related to Jeff Barnes, his best friend? He looked over to Jeff, who just had the same deer in the headlights look about him. This was _huge_ news!

"So, if your mom is my mom, do we have the same dad? You wouldn't happen to be Native American, would you?" Jeff finally asked.

"No, my father happens to be Romanian. After she was released for a brief while before my conception, she suddenly developed a massive fetish for Romanian men. I have my father narrowed down to three. Two of them are also incarcerated. As for the third one, his body was never found, although there _were_ rumors that his dismembered head was found inside a meat locker near Aspen."

"Amazing," Lester breathed.

"I know, right?" Gloria grinned before turning back to Jeff. "So, I guess that makes us half-siblings."

"Which half do I get?" Jeff asked with that same dumb smirk on his face that made Lester want to smack him.

"No, you _moron_ ; it means you two share the same mother but not the same _father_. Which brings me to subject of asking your permission to persue her intimately." Lester replied, licking his lips.

"Uh, I'm right here and dream on. In fact, I want both of you to take me to Chuck and Ellie's apartment. _Now_!"

Lester felt his heart fall somewhere in the vicinity of his genitals at her rejection. But he would not go quietly into that night. He would win her affections somehow, someway.

"Now that we're family, shouldn't we break bread or get naked and drunk first?" Jeff asked.

"You two are _insane_! I want out of here!" Gloria shouted, snatching up her purse and quickly walking out the door.

Lester put his arm around Jeff. "It's just proof you can't pick your family. She'll come around."

Jeff grabbed his keys and his wallet from the table in the living room. "Since she's family, does that mean I can't have sexual fantasies about her anymore?"

Lester scratched his chin for a moment before answering. "She's your _half_ -sister, Jeffrey."

"So that's a no?"

"It just means that you probably shouldn't tell anyone about them anymore. Anyone except me, that is. I need to know everything for my latest erotic novel I'm writing."

"I didn't know you were writing a novel."

Lester smiled. "That's cause it's all up here," he tapped his head. "Gotta get the ideas together before taking them to print."

Suddenly the horn honked from inside the van and both men jumped.

"Your half-sister is _pushy_ , man. You are going to _have_ to talk to her about that. Might I suggest counseling?"

* * *

 _What has gotten into me?_ Gloria thought to herself as she sat in the passenger seat, fuming. She had always wanted to find her family and now she found her half-brother; so why was she so angry about it? Was it because her new family member was an alcoholic, perverted weirdo who had an even more perverted weirdo for a sidekick? Or was she still freaked out about her recurring nightmare? Whatever it was, she knew she needed to calm down before her new family member disowned her.

"Look; I'm sorry for my outburst earlier. This is just a lot to take in, you know? After mom had me, I went straight into the foster system. The last family that took me in were great, but I constantly worried if I did something wrong, they would abandon me. So I went looking for my real parents when I was in high school. Chuck actually helped me find my mom, but all I know about my father is he's Romanian and possibly dead. Mom and I have been pen pals for nine years but she never told me that she had other children."

"You mean to tell me you discovered who she was in high school but have only been corresponding via snail mail for the last nine years?" Lester scoffed before looking behind him.

"It took me a long time to work up the nerve. What exactly do you say to the woman who is your birth mother _and_ a jailbird?"

"That's all very nice and touching, but I'm afraid we have bigger problems, fellas. We are being followed."

"How can you be sure?" Jeff asked.

"Because this abhorrent grey Mercedes has been behind us ever since we left my house!" Lester shouted. "We need to lose this bozo and fast. Jeffrey? It's time to put your Gran Turismo and your Grand Theft Auto skills to work."

Gloria unfastened her seat belt and climbed into the back. "Lester's right. He's tailing us. Can you lose him, Jeff?"

"I can try," Jeff said, pushing his foot down harder on the gas. Instantly, the Mercedes sped up, as well.

Gloria squinted her eyes to try and get a look at the driver, but the sunlight blinded her from viewing him through his windshield. _Why is he following us? What have these bozos done now?_

"Do you see him? Is he still following us?" Jeff asked.

"Yepper," she replied.

"Hang on tight, sis!"

A few seconds later, Jeff began swerving around traffic, ignoring the various honks and cursing from other drivers.

Lester turned his head. "I can't look!" he cried, placing his hands over Jeff's eyes.

Jeff continued to swerve the van erratically. "I can't see. Who turned out the lights?"

Gloria grabbed Lester and jerked him back away from Jeff. "Lester! You're going to get us _killed_!" As she did so, both she and Lester lost their balance as Jeff jerked the wheel once again and they both tumbled down in the back of the van.

As Jeff continued, the chili pepper lights that were strung from the van's roof began to fall down around them, as well as various other items.

"This is insane!" Lester yelled before a large stack of CDs fell around them. "Oh, great; just _great_! All of our _Jeffster!_ demo CDs!"

Gloria opened her mouth to ask what the hell he was talking about when Jeff's yellow and red lava lamp began to fall forward.

Quickly, Lester pulled her close, seconds before it crashed just inches from her head. "Well, that was close," he breathed sexily.

Gloria jerked away from him and looked out the back window of the van. "Oh my God! He's _still_ behind us!"

"Okay. Going off-road," Jeff nodded, looking back to them before leaving the highway and heading down a bumpy dirt road.

Lester sat up and brushed some debris and lights from his hair. "Do you have any idea where you're going?"

"Nope."

Gloria managed to crawl closer to Jeff's seat and look out the windshield. Almost immediately, she wished she hadn't. "Jeff! There's a junkyard down there with a big metal fence; you can't get through that!"

"Oh, God; I am going to die a virgin just like that old lady psychic at the carnival predicted," Lester whined. "Damn you, cosmos!"

Shielding her face with her hands and trying not to scream, Gloria watched in slow motion as Jeff plowed through the fence, the gate halfway resting on the hood of the van. _This is how we are gonna die; good, bad and ugly,_ she thought to herself.

"Outta my way, lil doggies!" Jeff whooped as two giant Dobermans suddenly appeared out of nowhere, barking and snarling.

As the van plowed ahead, the dogs jumped out of the way, but not before one of them leapt at the side of the van.

Lester jumped and let out a blood-curdling scream as the dog's gnashing teeth and Lester's face were only seperated by glass.

"Whew! That was close," Gloria sighed with relief. The worst part was over. Surely their stalker hadn't followed them _this_ far.

"Hey, Les?" Jeff asked.

"Yeah?" Lester replied, his voice still high and shaky.

"Is the road up ahead still washed away a little?"

"Yeah, I think so. Why?"

"Cause we're about to find out," Jeff narrowed his eyes and pressed down harder on the gas.

Gloria could see the warning signs that there was no road up ahead and jumped back beside Lester again. "Do you really think he's going to do what I think he's going to do?"

"Jeffrey, if we die, I am going to rise from my grave, float to yours and kill you again, I swear!"

"I can do this. I think."

"You _think_?!" both Gloria and Lester cried in unison before they felt the van lurch into mid-air. Without thinking, Gloria latched onto Lester, burying her head in his shoulder. _Goodbye, Chuck and Ellie. Goodbye, everyone. And God? Please don't let my body be recognizable. I don't want anyone to know I left my fate in the hands of my half-brother and his sidekick from Hell._


	5. Chapter 5

Chuck raced into the apartment he shared with his sister and her fiancé, his heart in his throat. As soon as he saw her in the kitchen, drinking a glass of lemonade, he sighed with relief. "Gloria! Oh, thank God! When Big Mike told me you had been in an accident, I-are you okay?" he hugged her tightly.

"I'm fine. I don't really know _how_ , but I'm fine. I'm just glad Jeff had Big Mike's number on speed dial so he could take us back here using the backroads."

"Wait; did you say Jeff? You and _Jeff_ were in a car accident?"

"Um, yeah; us too...thanks for caring about our safety, by the way. Much appreciated," Lester's voice replied sarcastically from the living room where he, Jeff and Devon "Captain Awesome" Woodcomb sat.

Chuck turned to look at them before turning back to Gloria, eyes wide. "What happened?"

As Gloria explained in great detail about Jeff's bad-ass driving skills, which he accredited to watching _The Dukes of Hazard_ , Chuck had to sit on one of the barstools to keep from fainting. "When we realized we successfully jumped the missing portion of the road and Mr. Mercedes had not, we found out that Jeff had three flat tires and a missing headlight. Jeff and Lester quickly called Big Mike and he brought us all here," she finished.

"Gloria, I understand that you have had a lot to deal with since coming back to Burbank; getting kidnapped by a crazy maniac, finding out that Sarah, Casey and I are spies, and having to work at the Buy More, but to hang out with Jeff and Lester? That's just...well, it's just not like you. I mean, you just came back and I promise we will spend time together, just like old times. But I kinda need you alive to do that," Chuck explained softly to her, half-grinning at the last part.

"Well, this will be of interest to you," Gloria smiled back, changing the subject. "I found another member of my family."

"You found your _dad_? That's great!"

"No. I found out I have a half-brother. Living right here in Burbank, too."

"Really? Who?" Chuck asked, his eyes brightening.

"Me," Jeff answered, standing behind Chuck on the other side of the bar.

Once again, Chuck turned around and then back at Gloria, wide-eyed. "Wait; really? Jeff is your-?"

"Yep. We have the same mother. Weird, huh?" she confirmed.

"Weird doesn't even begin to cover it," Chuck muttered with a smile plastered on his face.

"She's my half-sister from another mister. And since my real sister pretty much disowned me, she's a nice replacement," Jeff told them.

Chuck turned back to Jeff and scratched his head. "Hey; maybe Devon could drive you and Lester back to your house since Gloria's here with us."

"Yeah, I could take you guys; no problem," Captain Awesome stood up and grabbed his keys. "Come on."

"Thanks, Devon," Chuck sighed in relief as the three of them started to leave.

"Hey, Jeff?" Gloria asked suddenly.

"Yeah?"

"Be safe, okay?"

Jeff smiled and nodded before they walked out the door.

"Wow," Chuck said once they were gone. "That was...just...wow."

Suddenly, Gloria's face turned serious. "Chuck? You never...told anybody about what happened that day at my house, did you? You know, when you found me and-?"

"No, of course not. I promised that would always stay between just the two of us. Why?" Chuck asked, concern on his face. Just the fact that she mentioned it after all those years was enough for him to be worried.

"Because I'm having the nightmares again. I had one at Lester's last night. It was just like the ones I had after it happened, except I never saw you. I could hear you, but your figure was just a shadow."

Gloria bit her lip to keep from crying and Chuck instantly jumped up to embrace her. "Hey, it's alright. Don't freak out. The fire happened a long time ago but maybe you're having the nightmares again because you're back in Burbank. I'm sure they'll go away soon, okay?"

Gloria nodded. "Maybe. I just never want to think about that day ever again."

Chuck let her go and smiled at her sympathetically. It was hard to believe that the same woman who had publicly humiliated high school quarterback/bully Andy O'Donnell back in 10th grade could still be so paralyzed with fear over the house fire. But at this moment, Chuck knew was that he was glad she was here and safe with Ellie and Captain Awesome.

* * *

Jeff knew immediately that Lester was angry with him. He could almost feel the heat from the glares he was getting from his friend. What he didn't know was why. The ride back to Lester's house was quiet and tense even to the point Ellie's fiancé looked nervous. "Jeff, you want me to take you back to your place?" he finally asked as they pulled into Lester's mom's drive.

"He'll be fine staying with me. We have some things to _discuss_ ," Lester answered, his voice almost a growl.

"What he said," Jeff shrugged as he got out of the car and followed Lester inside.

As soon as the door was closed, Lester exploded like a miniature science fair volcano. "Just what was that back there when we hitched a ride with Big Mike, huh? You don't think I heard what went down?"

"Big Mike? What do you mean?"

"You offered to _teach_ her to play _Halo_? On the same night _we_ play _Halo_? And what red-blooded American-or Canadian-doesn't know how to play the biggest video game in the _history_ of mankind? I bet that woman hasn't played anything since _Mrs. Pac-Man_!" Lester ranted, running his fingers through his hair to calm himself down. " _Halo_ is _our_ thing, man. You know this. But now that you have a new sibling in your midst, your ole buddy Lester here gets shoved to the sidelines like the water boy in the game of _life_."

"What does football have anything to do with this?" Jeff asked, slightly confused.

"It's a _metaphor_ , Jeffrey! Actually, it's a simile, but let's not get technical about figures of speech!"

Jeff looked at Lester for a moment, carefully thinking about what he was saying. It all made sense to him now. Lester was _jealous._ "Okay, Les. I'm sorry. I'll let _you_ teach her to play _Halo_. But we really should leave Mrs. Pac-Man out of this. She never did anything. I thoroughly enjoyed popping that cherry-"

"You're impossible, Jeffrey Barnes; do you know that? Im-poss-ee-blay!"

"O-kay, but you still gotta give me a ride home," Jeff replied, walking out of the house.

"You can just _walk_ home, for all I care!" Lester cried before slamming the door in his face.

Jeff stood there for a minute before slumping his shoulders and trudging down the drive. Life was so much less complicated when it was just him and _Mrs. Pac-Man_.

* * *

Lester was just about to begin his binge-watching of Ernest P. Worrell movies when his cell phone rang. "Well, hopefully you have finally seen the error of your ways," he muttered before answering. "Lester here; my time on your dime."

"Feeling like the third wheel, Lester?" a strange voice crackled over the line.

"I'm sorry; who is this?"

"I know how you can take care of this new dilemma. All you need to do is get something I need. You help me and not only will it solve your Gloria problem, but I'll even sweeten the deal."

At first, Lester thought it was a prank. But the words 'Gloria' and 'sweeten the deal' caught his attention. "Sweeten the deal _how_? What are we talking? A lifetime membership to Hot Lonley Mamas dot com? A year's supply of Subway? Or prehaps setting up a meeting between me and that sexy mute girl who hangs out at Bennigan's?"

There was no reply on the line for a few seconds before the voice responded. "Better. How does fifty-thousand dollars sound?"

Lester felt his tongue and several other body parts start to tingle. "F-fifty t-t-thousand clams? _And_ to snap Lester back into reality? Ohhh, I'm in. You just tell me what I need to do, Cellular Phantom and consider it done."

As hot as Gloria Tipton was, it was time for her to go. He had Jeffrey first and blood or water, he was not going to give him up without a fight. And a hell of a lot of money to boot.


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry for the delay on this chapter. Last week, I was on vacation, so it was easy to post every other day or two. Sadly, now that I am back to the grindstone, I may be only able to post a new chapter once a week. Boo and hiss.**

"Sooo...how's the party planning going?" Morgan asked as he stopped by the Nerd Herd desk. He was glad that Gloria was finally beginning to settle in after her second week back in town. She and Ellie had decided to throw a party; not for any special occasion, but just to have some fun. With the help of Captain Awesome, Chuck and Sarah, Morgan knew this was going to be a great party. And he couldn't wait.

Gloria looked up at him and cocked her head. "I think it's going pretty well. We've got most of the stuff together. Is Anna going to be able to come?"

"I think so. She should be back from visiting her parents by tonight. Hopefully she'll be up for it. What about you? Huh? Any chance for some romance with a special someone?"

"Nope. I'm going stag. I've always been better as a solo act. Relationships are so...meh. I prefer keeping guys as friends. Always have; you know that."

Morgan chuckled. "Yeah. I remember you giving Gabriel Stafford a black eye when he tried to kiss you at lunch. He had his lips all puckered up and ready and next thing he knew, he was on the floor, screaming like a little baby. I gotta be honest, I was afraid to even _touch_ you after that. Not that I _would_ have, cause I mean-."

"Didn't he become a monk or something after graduation?" she interrupted.

Morgan, grateful for her cutting him off, looked upwards and waved his finger in the air. "You know; I think you're right."

"Well, it's five o'clock. Time to get ready to party like it's nineteen-ninety-," Jeff began but stopped, forgetting the last part.

"Nine, Jeffrey. The correct numerical verbalization is _nine_ ," Lester finished as they entered the break room.

Gloria giggled. "I'm glad you guys made up. Fighting over video games have been known to ruin friendships forever, but not you two. You are like the Laurel and Hardy of the Buy More. The Abbott and Costello, the-"

"Samuel and Adams," Jeff continued.

Morgan smiled and shook his head before he looked up at Casey, who was getting something out of his locker. "You goin' to the party tonight, Big Guy?"

Making a noise that sounded like a cross between a grunt and a sigh, Casey mumbled, "Yeah, I'm going."

The group was just about to leave when Emmett met them at the door. "And just where do you think the lot of you are headed to? Hmmm?"

"Where we're going," Lester began, "is not of your concern. After we have officially punched our time cards, you no longer _own_ us, Milbarge."

"Well, _she_ is not going anywhere," Emmett smiled, pointing at Gloria. "Not after I inform Big Mike of what she has been doing in the home theater room."

Morgan looked at Gloria. "He found out about karaoke night?" he whispered.

Gloria squared her shoulders and gave Emmett a look to kill. "I haven't been doing _anything_ wrong or illegal in the home theater room and so whatever you tell Big Mike will be a _lie_. But either way, I really would think twice about speaking to me with such disdain."

Emmett crossed his arms in defiance. "Oh, really? And why would I ever be afraid of _you_? Not to mention, I am packing all the time." With that, he proudly displayed his mace collection, strapped to his waist with a strange leather holder.

Morgan caught himself gulping loudly. He wasn't sure where this was headed, but images of high school bully Andy O'Donnell flashed through his mind. He and Chuck often recalled how she literally tackled him like a wild animal before making him cry like a little girl having nightmares. Either way, this was going to be both interesting and terrifying.

"I have four words for you, Emmett: after...hours...animal...porn," Gloria countered, holding up her fingers with each word.

Morgan-and everyone else-visibly watched as Emmett's face turned ghostly white.

"Y-you don't have any p-proof of that," he stammered.

"Oh, but I _do_ ," she gloated, pulling a flash drive from her pocket. "This flash drive has absolute proof that you have been discovering a whole new kind of Animal Planet. Care to call my bluff or shall I plug this puppy up and connect it to every television in the store?"

Emmett opened and closed his mouth several times, sweat beads forming on his forehead. "I-I-"

"Ooh, let's watch," Jeff said, rubbing his hands together happily.

"I'll go make the popcorn," Lester added, beginning to turn around.

"No!" Emmett shouted before recomposing himself and leaning forward, his face inches from hers. "You may have won this round, but the fight's not over yet, _hussy_."

"Bring it, Ass Man," she growled. "Now if you'll excuse us, we can't be late."

"That was _amazing_! I mean...wow. You really scared him to death!" Morgan cried, when they were out of earshot, shaking from the adrenaline rush.

"Impressive, Tipton," Casey agreed. "Is there really...you know...on that flash drive?"

"No, it's blank. But, Big Mike had me go to Emmett's office the other day and I accidentally bumped the mouse while getting a file off his desk. There is not a brain scrubber _big_ enough to get the image of those pandas outta my head," she replied with a shudder.

Jeff sighed in disappointment and Morgan wasn't sure if it was because he was sad she was bluffing or that he couldn't borrow it to watch. All he knew at that moment was that Gloria still had her feistiness. And God help _anyone_ that messed with her.

* * *

"Now, don't forget our deal, Lester. You bring me what I need and then meet me outside behind the apartments. We'll make the exchange there."

Lester held his cell phone between his shoulder blade and his chin. "I said I would get it and I will. I have a plan. A plan that will not fail. But why do you need-"

"Don't ask questions; just do what you are supposed to do. You get soft on me, man and you can forget about the money," the person on the other end barked.

"Hey; I'm not going soft, okay? How dare you even _imply_ such a thing? I'm a Hinjew of my word, if nothing else. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go set the master plan in motion. All _you_ have to do is keep those precious fifty thousand bills warm for me."

Lester snapped his phone shut and scanned the partygoers for Jeff. "Oh, imagine that; he's talking to _her_ ," he muttered, jealousy boiling inside of him. Thankfully, his envy and greediness overpowered his lust for her in that spaghetti strapped royal blue dress with the sequined bodice. Her skirt was short enough to show off her incredibly muscular legs without revealing _too_ much. _And those ankles are sinfully sexual enough to make a bishop kick out a stained glass window_ , he thought before shaking his head to clear his mind. _Stop it, Lester; you have a job to do. So get to it,_ he scolded himself instantly.

Carefully and casually, he began to make his way towards the fountain in front of the apartments. Making eye contact with Gloria, he nodded with his head for her to come over. He mentally fist bumped himself when she positioned herself perfectly in front of the fountain.

"Who were you talking to on the phone?" she asked with a grin. "Hopefully not a bookie."

Lester faked a hearty laugh. "A bookie...you are hilarious. That's actually more Jeff's thing. I was talking to my mom, actually. She misses me like _crazy_ sometimes."

"I hope you told her I love her house."

"Her house? What on Earth are you talking about, woman?"

Gloria grinned wider. "I seriously doubt your sister would have a photo of you at graduation in a frame that says 'My Baby Boy'."

Lester pulled at the collar of his shirt, completely caught off guard. He opened his mouth to reply, but no sound came out.

"Lester, it's okay. I feel a little more awkward now knowing I wore her clothes, but-" Gloria began, but Lester turned ever-so-slightly as one of Ellie's friends came nearby. Sticking his foot out a few inches, he successfully tripped the man, who stumbled into Gloria.

"Oh no!" the man yelled as Gloria tried to reach for Lester to steady herself, but Lester moved and Gloria fell backwards into the fountain.

"Gloria!" Ellie cried, as she and Devon quickly rushed to help her. "Oh, no. What happened?

"I'm so sorry. I tripped and bumped into her. It was an accident," the man apologized, his face turning red.

"It's alright, Frank," Devon clapped the man on the back.

"Come on; let's get you inside and cleaned up," Ellie told her. "Guys, it's okay. She's alright; just a little wet and shaky. Go on and go back to the party," she continued as everyone gathered around to see what had happened.

As the two girls entered the apartment, Lester smiled behind his bottle of beer. _Level one completed. Now for level two._ He could almost feel that money in his hand. He couldn't wait to go back home, throw the money up in the air and roll around in it. Fifty thousand dollars and all of it his. It was definitely worth it to see Gloria all wet. _Seems she has been spending a lot of time in that condition since her arrival,_ he thought to himself with a soft chuckle. As he looked over and saw Jeff, however, he felt just a minor twinge of something that could only be distantly related to guilt. That emotion, he knew for certain, would _have_ to go away and quickly.

"I hope Gloria's okay. Maybe I should go check on her," Jeff said as he took a swig of his beer, worry lines forming around his brow.

"She'll be fine with Enid," Lester assured him, forgetting Ellie's name as he often did. "Besides, you just wanna see her naked and I mean, come on; who doesn't?"

"Sometimes I wish she wasn't my half sister."

"Why is that? She too good for you? Hard to live up to her near impossible standards?"

"No. Cause I really do wanna see her naked and not have it scar me for life," Jeff confessed.

Lester gingerly patted his friend on the shoulder. "There, there. If you need me to see her naked _for_ you, buddy, I will."

Jeff looked up hopefully. "You will? You're the best, Les."

"That's what friends are for, Jeffrey. That is what friends are for."


	7. Chapter 7

"Oh, Chuck; there you are," Ellie said as she walked over to where he stood with Sarah and Casey. "Can we maybe talk for a minute?"

Chuck set down his drink and followed her to an area with less people nearby. "Sure, sis. What's up?"

Ellie bit her lip, as she always tended to do when she hated to say something. "It's about Gloria. Chuck, I'm worried about her."

"Is she hurt from the fall? She was awfully quiet when you and Devon escorted her back inside. Do I need to check on her?"

"No, she's fine. I'm letting her get changed and cleaned up inside. Chuck, it's more than that. I think she might be severely depressed."

Chuck gave her a lopsided grin. "Severely depressed? Here, in Burbank with _us_? Are you sure?"

Ellie didn't return Chuck's smile. "It seems that way. She's been pretty quiet since she's been here. She's also been waking up screaming a few times in the middle of the night and if Devon or myself ask her about it, she shuts down and says she doesn't remember. And I know she found out that Jeffrey is her half-sibling, but it worries me just how much time she spends with him. He's teaching her how to play video games, which isn't terrible, but God knows what else he and his creepy friend are teaching her. Can you please just talk to her?"

Chuck nodded. "Of course I will, but don't freak out. I think she's just trying to find her place. We're not in school anymore and now she is discovering more about her real family and it's a lot for her to take in. But I promised her very soon, we'd have movie night just like we did back then."

"Thanks. I think of her like a little sister, too, you know and it just breaks my heart to see her hiding inside her shell."

"Well, thanks for telling me. I promise to try and keep an eye out for her. I love her, too, so if something is bothering her, I want her to know she can tell me."

Ellue hugged her little brother and glanced at her bedroom window, where Gloria was getting changed. As eased as she felt by Chuck's promise, she still couldn't help but to worry something else was going on. Gloria was dealing with something she was keeping inside and all Ellie could do was hope and pray that Chuck could get her to open up before she lost herself completely.

* * *

Gloria slid her fingers down the side of a picture frame in Ellie's bedroom and smiled softly. The silver frame had the word "Family" etched into it with tiny hearts and flowers. Inside was a photo of Ellie, Devon and Chuck, although Morgan's head was peering out of a bush nearby. How she wished she had a frame like that in her home of her, Jeff and their mom. Or better yet, a photo of her with both of her birth parents. Her foster parents never took a family photo because they thought it was a silly Norman Rockwell-esque tradition. Not to mention, they never let her forget that she was only a charity case. Sure, they fed her and clothed her and gave her a place to sleep, but there was no warmth or heart there. Not like Chuck's family. They were a real, warm and loving family. Their dad might have been away more often than not, but the love between Chuck and his sister was genuine. And despite only being a friend, Morgan seemed to fit in as the goofy brother, instead. While Chuck's family was nowhere _near_ perfect, it was pretty close compared to hers.

 _Get it together, Tipton,_ she scolded herself, taking the towel from her still slightly wet hair. She was wearing only a cream colored cloth towel around her as she looked through her duffel bag for a pair of pants and her green vintage _Shirt Tales_ shirt.

Suddenly, she heard someone outside the door, but she didn't pay much attention. "Ellie, I want to thank you again for-", she began, turning around, but saw someone else standing inside the room. "Lester! Get _out_ of here!" she screamed before he raised a camera and snapped a flash photo of her.

"Smile!" he grinned.

Gloria held her towel in place as she began to run towards the door, but the flash momentarily blinded her, causing her to stumble on the corner of the bed. "Lester Patel! When I get my hands on you, that camera will be permanently inserted up your ass!" she vowed. She had just earlier convinced herself that Lester didn't purposefully move out of the way so the man could push her into the fountain. Now, however, she wasn't certain. _Little pipsqueak probably thought he could snap a photo of me in the shower. Good thing I locked the door._

She quickly changed-after locking the bedroom door-and pulled her hair back in a ponytail. The only baseball cap she had with her still had a mustard stain on the bill from her hot dog eating contest with Jeff a few days before. Jeff had won by a landslide, but both she and Lester left shortly after, only to come back with a huge bottle of Pepto-Bismol from Large Mart for him. Smiling at the memory, she opened the bedroom door, only to nearly run into Morgan, his hand raised and balled into a fist.

"I was just about to check on you; not that you _need_ checking up on, but I just thought I would-," he rambled.

"Thanks, Morgan, but I'm fine. Just gotta make an appearance now to let everyone else know," she replied as they walked outside.

As soon as she exited, she was met by smiles and applause. "Wow, thanks, guys," she blushed. "I'm okay. Let's continue this party and I'll try to steer clear of that big wet cement thing," she joked, causing scattered laughter.

"Nice shirt," Jeff said as she made her way to his table, several empty bottles of beer lying there.

"Thanks." Involuntarily, Gloria reached up to play with her necklace, but froze when she couldn't feel it there. _Where did it go? Last place I remember seeing it was on the dresser right by the bedroom door..._

"You want a beer?" Jeff asked her, not noticing as her facial expressions changed.

"Where is Lester?"

"I don't know. I haven't seen him for a while now. Why?"

Suddenly, Gloria's face turned red with rage. "Because that son of a bitch stole my necklace!"

* * *

Lester rolled his eyes as a bread truck pulled behind the apartments. He had been waiting for ten minutes and his patience was wearing thin.

"You're late," he growled as the guy, dressed all in black, hopped out. "Now I brought you what you want. What about what _I_ seek?"

The man lifted up a suitcase. "It's all here. Fifty thousand dollars in small bills. You give me the necklace and I give you the money."

Lester chuckled. "Not so fast. I wasn't born _yesterday_. I need to _see_ the money. I want to smell the enticing aroma of its monetary value."

The man glared at him. "Fine." As he opened up the suitcase to reveal the money, he quickly snapped it shut as Lester's face was inches away, causing him to flinch. "Now. The necklace."

Lester pulled the necklace from his pocket and handed it to him. "It was a pleasure doing business with you," he reached his hand out to take the money.

Suddenly, the man reached in _his_ pocket and pulled out a .22 caliber and shoved it in Lester's chest. "Change of plans. Get in the back of the truck."

Lester's eyes grew wide in horror, but he tried to play it cool. "What sort of game are you playing, man? Unless there is more money in that abhorrent bread truck of yours, our deal is done."

"Your life is going to be done if you don't get in the back of my abhorrent bread truck. Now _move it_!" the man barked, cocking the gun.

Lester backed up slowly, his hands up. "So all of this was a set-up? Just how valuable _is_ that necklace?"

As they got to the truck, the man opened the back and shoved Lester inside. "I needed bait. And the necklace wasn't it. _You_ were, chump!"

Lester tried to get up but the man slammed the doors shut and bolted them. He had fallen into a trap! How could he have been so _stupid_? "Hey!" he yelled, getting up and peeking through the small windows in the back. As terrified as he felt a minute before was nothing compared to how he felt as he saw the one person he hoped he wouldn't see: Gloria. The man was right; Lester himself was the bait and his greediness and jealousy had led Jeff's half-sister right into a possibly deadly trap. "What have I done?" he whispered. "Good God, what have I done?"


	8. Chapter 8

Panic began to rise into Lester's throat as he continued to watch her stroll towards them. He had to warn her! " _Gloria_!" he shouted as loud as he could, banging on the doors and wall of the truck. Surely, she had to hear him at some point.

Unfotunately, he was wrong. Lester grimaced as the man in black jumped out from behind and pressed the gun against her side while covering her mouth with his other hand. Gloria struggled for just a moment but her attempts were futile as he practically man-handled her all the way to the back of the truck.

"Get in here with your little friend!" the man yelled as he unlocked the doors, opened them and shoved her inside, knocking Lester over in the process. As he shut the doors again and secured them, he looked over for a moment and thought at first that Gloria had been knocked unconscious. "Glor-" was all he was able to get out before he found out differently.

"You stole my necklace and led me into a trap, you creep!" she screamed, effortlessly pinning him down and pressing her knee into his throat. "You are scum of the Earth, do you know that?"

"Look, I'm sorry," he pleaded with her, his voice raspy and higher than he had meant for it to. "Could you please remove your knee before it crushes my trachea?"

Gloria remained in her position of murderous proportion for a few seconds longer before releasing him.

Lester instantly sat up, grabbed his throat and began wheezing and coughing. Although he would never admit it to anyone else, she had genuinely frightened him in a way that no woman ever did. That was including Sarah when she practically devoured him at the Weinerlicious after she and Chuck broke up, in which he shortly after had a panic attack. He would have had one at this moment, were he able to breathe to begin with.

"I can't believe you set me up, you little weasel," she growled, glaring at him.

"Look, I didn't know this was a setup," he gasped, still rubbing his throat gingerly. "I was told to give Mr. Douchebag the necklace in exchange for money. That was the extent of it, I swear."

"Well, it looks like we both got played. Not that I have anything this guy wants," Gloria muttered before banging on the truck behind the driver's seat. "You've got the wrong person! Do you _hear_ me? I don't have what you want!" she yelled.

"Shut up back there or I'll be forced to use my gun on _both_ of you!" the man hollered back.

"Shutting up now!" Lester called back, receiving another icy cold glare from her. "So do you mind telling me who this guy is and what he supposedly thinks that you have?"

"I don't have to discuss anything with _you_."

"O-kay, fine. We can just enjoy the ride to our impending doom in silence."

Gloria nodded. "Fine."

"Fine."

For the next few minutes, they sat quietly, but Lester noticed something was on Gloria's mind and it wasn't just a massive desire to kill him.

"How did he know you would get so worked up about some necklace, anyway?" Lester finally asked.

"It's not just _some_ necklace," Gloria replied softly. "It's the only thing I have from my real father. When I was still in foster care, a package came adressed specifically for me; typed out on a crappy typewriter." She smiled as she remembered. "It was a tiny brown package with an ugly thin rope as a bow. Inside was a necklace and a letter. In that same typed format, it just said 'From Dad. Every time a snowflake falls, I will remember you' in Romanian. I've worn it every day since." She looked down as she played with her hands. "So it isn't just some necklace."

Lester leaned his head back against the wall of the truck and closed his eyes, feeling as if he had been punched in the gut. _Why did she have to tell me that story?_ he thought as guilt washed over him like soured milk. _This really is all my fault._

Suddenly, the truck stopped and they heard the man get out. "We're here, guys. Now don't think you can be heroes, cause you can't. I got back-up now."

As he opened up the truck, Gloria took a position to pounce, but stopped when she saw two other men, pointing guns right at them. "I really hoped you were a liar on that," she growled before Lester and her were escorted out of the truck and into a warehouse nearby at gunpoint.

When they got inside, Lester realized it was not just an ordinary warehouse. There were small rooms with air-sealed doors and metallic beds down a hallway, and numerous televisions down another hallway across from the rooms. As they continued, they were led to a central room, which had a few computers, a large screen and several tech devices against a wall. Across from the large screen was a very tall metallic looking clothes rack type thing in the middle of the room with ropes and leather cuffs hanging down. "What the hell _is_ this place?" Lester mumbled aloud, looking around.

"Your new home. For now," the traitor in black grinned.

"Nice work, Faison," an older gentlemen nodded.

"My pleasure, boss."

Lester shook his head. "I got duped by a man named _Faison_? What's your boss' name? _Braff_?" He noticed Gloria smirked a little at his _Scrubs_ reference.

The older man, however, did not find it amusing. "No. My name is Theodore Blackwell. And you two are not going to be laughing for long."

Lester looked over and saw that Faison was brandishing a very large and extremely sharp knife. _Oh, shit. We're gonna die_ , he thought, closing his eyes. _Mama!_

"The microchip, Gloria. Give it to me or I'll have Faison take it," Blackwell demanded.

"I don't have it. You, sir, are a moron who hasn't learned his lesson the first time around!" she barked.

Suddenly, Faison walked over to her and with one quick swipe of his knife, cut the back of her left hand, just between her thumb and index finger.

Lester felt himself nearly pass out as he watched. _Don't faint, Patel. Do not faint._

"Ow! What the hell was that for-oh," Gloria said before looking down and seeing that something was indeed embedded inside her hand.

Blackwell handed Faison a pair of tweezers. "Remove the chip, please."

"Suddenly, I feel like a live action _Operation_ game," she muttered as Faison prepared to take the chip out. "If you miss, do I get to make the loud buzzing sound?"

Lester looked away as Faison expertly removed the chip. This was absolutely insane. He just _thought_ he knew the woman beside him. "Let me guess; you also have an entire CPU hidden inside one of your breasts," he drawled.

"I know that I have some heavy artillery in my foot which is about to get shoved straight up your a-"

" _Silence!_ Both of you!" Blackwell shouted, causing them both to freeze. "Faison; wrap her hand and tie them up."

"Sure thing, boss."

* * *

"Please don't hurt me; please don't hurt me!" Lester repeated as he and Gloria were hanging, their arms above their heads and fastened with the leather straps around their wrists.

"Will you shut up? He hasn't done anything yet," Gloria hissed. She had to admit that it gave her a bit of satisfaction to know he was uncomfortable after everything he did.

"And here you thought I didn't know about the microchip," Blackwell told her smugly. "But I know that and so much more."

"How in the hell did you know I had a chip implanted inside my body when I didn't even know myself? What did you do, x-ray me in my _sleep_ one night?"

"I know your foster parents inserted it when you were seven. You see, your foster parents weren't who they seemed. They both actually worked for the CIA-"

Gloria instantly got choked. "They were _spies_? But that's impossible! They were the most boring, unemotional, robotic people in the _universe_! You must be lying."

Blackwell smiled. "Oh, but it's true. We have been after them for _years_. But when we got word that _you_ had the microchip, we decided to focus our efforts on you, instead."

Gloria wanted to scream, but opted to fight back tears, instead. How did this happen? How could the two people who fostered her and vowed to protect her put her in this kind of danger? How could she not know she had something implanted inside of her own body? How could any of this be possible? It was too much. She glanced over to see Lester, who was focusing on some sort of Lamaze-esque breathing techniques and she rolled her eyes. _God, please just let the Earth below me open up and swallow me. Or just make me disappear forever. No one is as they seem. Chuck and my foster parents are spies, Lester is a jackass and Jeff can't help me. Once again, it's just me against the world. And I don't know how much more of a fight I can put up._

"So what exactly does this microchip _do_ , per se?" Lester asked. "Resolve world conflict? End hunger in third-world countries? Do everyone's taxes?"

"We-we don't know. All we know is that it's something big," Faison answered. "But _she_ knows."

Now, Gloria _did_ start to cry. "No, I don't! Please; I am begging you. I know nothing about this. Just do your own damn research and let me go."

"Us. Let _us_ go," Lester corrected.

"Sorry. No can do," Blackwell shook his head. "Your foster mother whispered in your ear what the microchip does. You were eleven and deathly ill with the flu. As your mother lie by your hospital bed, she held your hand and told you what the chip does. Need proof? Faison, show the video."

Faison punched a button on a laptop and the main video screen in front of them showed a slightly grainy video of Gloria in the hospital, machines and monitors beeping as she barely lay awake. She recalled being in the hospital, but not much else. Continuing to watch the video, she saw her foster mother lean over, grab her hand and whisper something incoherent into her ear. Younger Gloria smiled a little before she fell asleep, her chest rising and falling rhythmically.

"Now, tell me what she said," Blackwell demanded as Faison paused the video.

"I don't remember. I was sick and so tired. I really don't know," Gloria sobbed, her voice almost a whisper. "Please. I just wanna go home."

"Until you can remember, this _is_ your home."

As Blackwell and Faison walked away, leaving her and Lester literally hanging, Gloria continued to cry softly.

"Don't worry; we'll figure a way out of this. Jeff will realize that we're missing and he'll get help."

Gloria looked over at Lester, eyebrow raised. "You are depending on _Jeff_ to save us?"

"Ah, you're right; who am I kidding? We're doomed."


	9. Chapter 9

**Finally came up with a title! Yay me!**

Jeff was finishing his eighth-or was it eighteenth?-beer when Chuck's girlfriend Sarah walked up to him. "Jeff, have you seen your sister?"

"Only half of her," Jeff slurred, snickering at his lame joke.

"Jeff, this is serious. When was the last time you saw Gloria?"

"About an hour ago. She was going to kill Lester," Jeff responded before belching.

Sarah wrinkled up her nose at the repugnant odor. "Why was she going to kill Lester?"

"She said 'that son of a bitch stole my necklace'; her words, not mine. Haven't seen them since. Maybe they went somewhere to get their freak on."

"Something tells me that's not it," Sarah responded with a grimace.

Jeff wanted to ask her why she was so concerned, but he was unable to release the words from the heavy fog in his brain. He looked to where she was standing, but she was already gone. "Oh, well," he told the empty space. "The less, the merrier. Time for another ice cold beer," he reached over to the cooler next to him and picked up a brown bottle.

"Dude, I don't think you need any more alcohol. Getting wasted at Ellie and Gloria's party is _not_ awesome," Devon stepped in, putting his hand slightly over Jeff's to try and take the bottle away.

"You have very soft hands. Smoother than anyone else's I know," Jeff observed before leaning closer, his voice a whisper. "They're even softer than Lester's and he uses lady lotion."

Devon snatched the bottle away and dragged the cooler off as well, his face a look of horror and awe.

"Well, I guess I'll go find them myself. No booze, no sex; this party is lame, anyway."

* * *

Chuck's eyes lit up as he saw Sarah coming towards him and Casey. "Did you find Gloria?"

"Afraid not, but apparently, according to Jeff, she went looking for Lester. He stole her necklace and she went after him to get it back," she reported.

"Oh, man. Lester stole her _necklace_? Then it should be _easy_ to find them. Just listen for Lester's screams of mercy."

Casey half-grinned at that. "I wouldn't mind getting a front row seat to that show."

"Uh, _no_. That necklace means a lot to her. I don't wish to see _anyone_ -Lester included-on the receiving end of her rage." Chuck then turned to Sarah. "So you think she's just with Lester, right? You don't think she was kidnapped again, do you?"

Sarah gave Chuck a look that told him everything he didn't want to know. "Chuck, don't freak out. We don't know that that's what has happened. It's just been a while since anyone has seen her or Lester."

"And I gave her a keychain that will immediately turn on a GPS tracker as soon as she presses the center of it. She's a smart woman; if she needs our help, she'll use it," Casey chimed in.

"Guys, we don't know if she has it with her. And until I know for sure that she is safe and that she hasn't murdered Lester and buried him out in the pine barrens, I really think we need to look for her," Chuck argued.

Chuck watched as Sarah and Casey looked at each other before looking back at him and nodding in unison.

"Let's go find them," Sarah smiled and Chuck felt the butterflies in his stomach grow into mutant dragonflies.

* * *

Faison sat in a chair close to where the two prisoners were and ate his Almond Joy bitterly. After managing to kidnap Gloria by using her friend and then successfully removing the chip for his boss, a stupid candy bar was all he got in return for his efforts. At least Gloria wasn't crying anymore. He _hated_ when women cried. Now she just looked like someone who had been whipped. She wasn't struggling; she wasn't doing much of anything. She was just staring at the floor and hanging there, ignoring Lester's whines and grunts of the occasional struggle.

"Do you have any idea how many people are out looking for us?" Lester finally asked. "Any minute now, they'll be busting down the door, raising hell until we are free."

Faison looked at his watch. "Should I set a timer or something? No offense, but you two have been gone quite a while and I have yet to see or hear _anyone_ around."

"That's what they _want_ you to believe. It's all about the element of surprise."

Faison snickered. "Nice try. Not only am I not buying that, I'm not even _renting_ it."

He stuck the last bite of his candy bar in his mouth and sucked the melted chocolate off his fingers. He glanced over once again to Gloria, who continued to stare off in a daze. _Wow, she's really overwhelmed with the news that her fake parents were spies. Maybe she really_ doesn't _recall what that thing does,_ he thought to himself, feeling a twinge of sympathy.

"Faison; get to the back entrance. I need your assistance," his boss Blackwell barked through his earpiece.

"Gotta go; you two kiddos have fun, you hear?" Faison stood up and stretched before heading towards the back of the warehouse.

* * *

 _I can't believe it's going to be up to me to save us,_ Lester thought miserably. Gloria was in no condition mentally to escape her way out of a paper sack. Did her necklace also give her special powers that when taken away left her completely vulnerable? He glanced up to the leather straps clasped around his wrists and the rope tied from the strap to the metallic bar above. If only he hadn't let his mom talk him into getting a manicure the day before yesterday. He was perfecting a jagged fingernail that could have sliced through almost anything. Now, his nails were expertly cut, shaped and buffed.

"Psst," Gloria hissed a few seconds later.

"Can I help you?" Lester whispered back, unable to hide his frustration.

"Can you hear them? Blackwell and Faison?"

"No. Why? Afraid you'll wash them away with your tears?"

"Don't make me remind you of why we are here in the first place, moron. I wanted them to think I was all depressed and defeated."

Lester wasn't sure if she was lying but he had a feeling she wasn't being completely honest. "So you knew your foster parents were spies and that they planted evidence of that literally inside of you?"

"Of _course_ I didn't know that! Nor do I know what they want me to remember. But I can't just give up. As hard as all that was to find out, I can't let them win. I've been through too much..." she said, her voice trailing off.

"Great. Never say die; carpe diem and all that. But the question still remains: how in the hell are we going to get out of here?"

"You keep mentioning this 'we' word. You think after stealing my necklace and causing both of us to be kidnapped means nothing and we're just going to go back to swinging it like old-" she stopped and Lester saw a mental lightbulb go off above her head. "That's it! Lester, use your foot to gently give me a push from behind. If I can swing high enough to go over the bars, I just might be able to get free."

"That is the craziest plan I have ever heard," Lester argued.

Gloria growled. "Just do it."

"Did I mention also brilliant?" Lester then managed to lift his left leg, stretch it out and gingerly press his foot behind her butt to give her a push. He watched as she bent and straightened her legs to give her even more momentum. "I really hope you don't get motion sickness easily, because I, myself, am feeling slightly nauseous."

"Shut up and keep pushing."

Lester bit his lip and did as he was told. He tried not to look as she continued to swing higher and higher until she managed to swing herself over the bar.

"Ow! This was a good plan albeit not the most comfortable one," she grunted before the rope snapped from the tension and she fell on the floor.

"Please hurry. They could be coming back at any minute."

Gloria stood up and brushed the dirt off before grabbing the knife Faison used to cut her hand.

"Oh, God. Really? You don't have any diseases I should know about, do you?"

Gloria reached up and began cutting the rope, her teeth gritted. "The only reason I am saving your sorry ass is because Jeff would never forgive me for leaving you."

"Ow," Lester replied as the rope snapped and he landed awkwardly, but the physical pain wasn't what hurt the most. It was the pain her words had inflicted on his heart and soul. As he removed the leather strap from his wrist, Gloria grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the room and down one of the hallways.

Lester felt relief wash over him as they neared the corner towards a side exit, but as they turned, what they saw made both of them come to a screeching halt.

"Going somewhere?" Blackwell said, pointing a gun at the neck of their newest prisoner.

"Jeffrey?!" Lester cried, eyes wide.

"Hey, this party is so much better. How come I wasn't invited?" Jeff responded, almost too inebriated to stand.

Lester and Gloria looked at Jeff, jaw open and eyes wide before looking back at each other. This situation had just gone from bad to worse in only a matter of seconds. And as Lester looked at Blackwell's smirk and his gloating demeanor, he knew it would be a long time before things would start to look up again.


	10. Chapter 10

As he looked back and forth from Lester to Gloria's faces, Faison knew this was the last thing they had expected. He knew from back when he had to spy on her that this heavily intoxicated man was Gloria's own half-brother and Lester's best friend, but Faison had no idea how his boss managed to lure him here.

"You've stooped to a new low, Slimewell; kidnapping a defenseless drunk guy in hopes that it'll make me remember," Gloria spat, but Faison could tell she was terrified.

"Hey; it was just a lucky coincidence. Caught this 'defenseless drunk guy' sniffing around the truck," Blackwell smirked.

"The bread truck was calling to me. I've been craving some tasty pumpernickel all day. Kinda lame for a bread truck to not have anything in it," Jeff slurred. "Especially when I had walked so far to find it."

"Took him about twenty seconds to tell me all about looking for Lester and his new-found family member. I mean, what are the odds?"

Gloria bristled. "Let him go. Let him and Lester go. You want me, and that's all you need."

"Sorry," Blackwell grinned even wider. "I need leverage. Faison, lock up Lester in a room. I'll stick the near-siblings in a separate holding area."

"Wait; is this really necessary?" Lester asked nervously. "I mean, can't we talk about this first?"

Faison grabbed Lester by the back of his shirt collar. "Sorry. Boss' orders."

"No, wait; you don't understand! I have abandonment issues! Jeffrey!" Lester yelled as Faison dragged him away.

Faison watched out of the corner of his eye as Gloria started to lunge at Blackwell but he cocked the gun that he was still pointing at Jeff. "Ah, ah, ah," he scolded. "Not the smartest move."

"Listen; please. Don't let him hurt Jeff. Or Gloria. She doesn't remember anything. Why is he _doing_ this?" Lester asked as Faison opened up a small five-foot-by-seven-foot room with a metal platform on the left for a makeshift bed.

Faison looked at him as the door opened with a hiss and shoved him inside. "He wants power. And Gloria can give him that power. Besides, I thought you didn't care about her."

As the door sealed shut and locked, he watched Lester pound on the door, screaming something vulgar at him.

"Sorry; can't hear. It's soundproof," he mouthed in reply, pointing at his ear before walking off just in time to see Blackwell lock Jeff and Gloria in the next cell that was slightly larger with two metal beds instead of one. The truth was, he was beginning to wish he could have promised Lester that they would be okay. But then Blackwell would make sure Faison could never promise anything to anyone ever again.

* * *

Jeff listened as best he could to Gloria as she paced back and forth, recanting the story of what had taken place before his arrival. He saw that her hand was bandaged up from where they had cut her to extract the tiny chip. He felt terrible; both for her and Lester, as well as himself for getting so intoxicated. Usually, drinking in excess never made him feel guilty, but now he couldn't help but to feel his alcoholism was partially to blame for what had happened. If he had been thinking clearly, he would have asked Chuck or his fine sister Eleanor where Gloria and Lester had run off to. They could have formed a search party and maybe stopped those two bread theives and their dastardly plot with the microchip. Or was it a potato chip? He couldn't remember.

Suddenly, as he looked up at her, he clutched his stomach as a wave of nausea hit him. "Can you please stop pacing? You're giving me motion-sickness."

Gloria quickly sat down on the metallic platform across from him. "How much did you have to drink, Jeff?"

"Too much but not nearly enough," he replied. He then pulled a flask from his inside jacket pocket. "But I brought backup. Want some?"

Gloria looked at the flask for a moment before practically lunging for it. He watched as she opened it and took a long swallow. Never except for in that moment had he been so sure they were in fact related. He was even prouder when she wiped her mouth using the back of her good hand. "Anyway, we have to get out of here," she said before handing it back to him. "If he thinks I am ever going to remember what my foster mother whispered to me as I lay in bed running a high fever, he's out of his tiny mind."

"Then just lie," Jeff responded with a shrug. "It always works for me."

"Lie? But what happens when he finds out I falsified information he desperately wants to know? He will _kill_ me! And maybe even kill the people I love."

"Well, if you're going to be a buzzkill about it, forget I mentioned it," Jeff responded with a half-shrug.

Gloria gave him a smile in return. "It was the thought that counts. Really."

Jeff smiled back and let her have another drink from his flask. He wasn't too worried about them escaping at that moment. He was rather enjoying the rest from his walk from the party all the way to wherever they were. He just hoped Lester was okay. As much as his friend would deny it, he knew Lester was scared enough for all of them.

* * *

Lester sat on the hard bed and leaned his head against the wall, eyes closed. He tried to think of happy things: he and Jeff hitting up hot chicks at Bennigan's, the smell of a newly packaged video game, poker night after work, his mom's chicken and rice dinner, but all he could feel was the sharp pain in his chest and the sting of Gloria's words as they repeated over and over in his mind. "The only reason I am saving your sorry ass is because Jeff would never forgive me for leaving you," he mouthed as he heard her voice, dripping with such venom. She hated him and it affected him more than he cared to admit. Sighing, he opened his eyes and looked around his dreary holding area. Bulletproof glass doors that were sealed air tight, flat metallic surface for sitting and 'sleeping', ugly grey walls, small radio sticking out of the wall opposite the bed...

"Wait; they put a _radio_ in here?" he asked aloud, walking over to the small brown speaker with two dials below. He turned the left dial to the right until it clicked on and a small red light glowed at the top. Hearing no sound, he turned the right dial, which picked up white noise until he finally heard a voice through the speaker. A very recognizable voice.

"You still angry with Lester over stealing your necklace?" Jeff's voice asked, the sound so clear, it almost sounded as if he were in the same room.

"Of _course_ I am angry at him. He took something of sentimental value and for what? Money that he never received. If our lives weren't in peril right now, his would still be. What he did was unforgivable," Gloria's bitter voice responded and Lester begged for the floor below to open up and swallow him. How could one person make him feel so...small? Why did he care what she thought so much? He had wanted her to back off from Jeff because of jealousy, but he also wanted her attention so badly that it scared him. Now, as she explained to Jeff, she wanted nothing more to do with him. And that made him feel worse than when she spent so much time with his best friend.

"I'm sure he feels bad about it," Jeff told her, although Lester noted that even _his_ voice sounded somewhat uncertain.

"Oh, I'm sure he does now that we're all trapped here like _rats_. But if only _I_ had been taken, he would have brushed his hands of me and went on his way. Especially if he had gotten the money he had been promised. Fifty thousand dollars and all he had to do was steal my necklace. Easy money. Honestly, Jeff; I don't even know _why_ you consider him your best friend."

Tears stung at Lester's eyes and it felt as if someone literally had an icy grip around his heart. Using all the strength he had, he angrily ripped the speaker from the wall and left it hanging, wires exposed. It didn't make Lester feel any better but at least he wouldn't have to listen to the two of them continue to berate him and make him feel even more worthless than he already felt.

* * *

Gloria sat beside Jeff, waiting for his answer. She was amazed at how quickly he was sobering up. She had gotten him to talk about their mom-who was a character of her own to say the least-and he explained his band with Lester, aptly called _Jeffster_. But now, the conversation had turned more serious. She had to understand why Jeff continued to put up with Lester.

"Well," he began slowly. "Les is my best friend cause he gets me. He knows about my messed up childhood cause _he_ came from a messed up childhood. He accepts me for who I am and listens to me. Nobody knows Lester better than me and nobody knows me better than him. The thing about Lester is, he acts all cocky and self-absorbed, but the truth is, he's just scared. People have let him down his whole life. They walked away from him when he needed someone the most. So he doesn't let too many people see the real him. I guess with Lester, it's easier to push people away and make them hate him than it is to let them in and then have them just leave. Or laugh behind his back, which is worse. He might get me in trouble or come up with a crazy plan, but I go along with it cause I'm either too drunk to care or I just don't want him to take the fall alone. That's what friends are for. At least, I _think_ so."

Gloria looked at him momentarily before embracing him in a warm hug. "You are a good friend, Jeff. And I have been a horrible person. I had no idea Lester was so insecure. He-he sounds a lot like me. I'm _terrified_ of being alone. It goes with the territory of being abandoned as a baby. I worried everyday that my foster parents would send me back into the system. My whole life, all I wanted was a family that would love me and accept me for who I was; flaws and all. I owe Lester an apology. I have been so cruel to him. Yes, he stole something valuable to me, but I now know why."

Jeff looked at her, curiousness in his eyes. "Why?"

Gloria smiled bittersweetly. "Because he was afraid I was going to come between the two of you. He thought you would leave him because you found out I was your half-sister." She walked over to the other side of the room, closer to the holding area where Lester was. Knowing he couldn't hear her, she didn't care. She had to say it. "Lester, I want to be your friend, too. I would never make Jeff choose. You two are as much family as we are. We may share the same mother but you are his soul brother. And I am so sorry for making you think otherwise," she whispered, a single tear sliding down her cheek. She was going to make it up to him; they just had to get out of trouble, first.


	11. Chapter 11

**NOTE: A very special thanks goes out to Kathryn Oelssner Rydz for helping me to come up with a name for Lester's stuffed elephant. I felt it fit Lester's innocent and childlike side. The man still wears footie pajamas, people! It's both awkward and cute.**

 _"Please; take my hand!"_

 _Gloria looked around, but all she could see were the flames from the fire and dark smoke. "I-I can't! I'm too scared!" she screamed, tears running down her cheeks, but oddly enough, her voice carried no sound. She looked for Chuck's face, but all she could see was a blurry figure, his face completely unrecognizable. Even his_ voice _sounded strange._

 _"We don't have time," Chuck's 'voice' said before he stretched his hand towards her._

 _She looked down at his hand, but it soon disappeared, as did Chuck altogether. "Chuck? Chuck, where are you?" she coughed, waiting for a reply as panic started to set in._

 _"Don't leave; please don't leave me!" a voice, also unrecognizable cried out before the fire completely consumed her._

"Aah!"

Gloria sat straight up, clutching her throat. She looked around and instantly recognized that she was still inside Blackwell's holding area, Jeff sleeping across from her. Wiping the sweat from her forehead using her shirt sleeve and fighting the urge to burst into tears, she thanked the heavens that her startled cry didn't wake her half-sibling. "That's it; I _have_ to get out of here," she muttered, rolling over on her side. As she did, something in her pants pocket poked her in the leg. "Dammit," she cursed before pulling the object out. "Oh, yeah. The keychain."

"Just push the center with your fingerprint and it will activate an emergency signal," John Casey had told her. She looked down at it now, her index finger hovering only centimeters away. It would be so easy to press the button and have Casey, Sarah, and Chuck come to her rescue yet again. But then what would they tell Jeff and Lester? Would it blow their covers? Gloria _herself_ wasn't even supposed to know, but she knew that Chuck could trust her with their secret. Jeff and Lester, however would have it broadcasted on the news or on social media outlets within the hour.

"I can't take that chance. I have to do this myself," she nodded before throwing the device against the wall, smashing it into pieces.

"Mmm...you taste like chicken, Ms. Simpson. Or is it fish?" Jeff muttered in his sleep, causing her to look at him, eyebrow raised in curiosity. Out of the corner of her eye, however, she saw that the big screen on the wall was being reflected through the glass and that it was now white with red type that read _4701*_ , whereas it had been black earlier.

"What does _that_ mean?" she whispered, assuming Faison had turned on the computer. As she looked around, she finally saw a compartment on the wall by the door. Opening it, she discovered a tiny keypad. _How did I miss this before?_ she thought before entering the numbers and symbol.

Seconds after she did, the door opened with a loud hiss and Gloria nearly whooped with joy. Running over, she shook Jeff. "Jeff; wake up! We're free. Let's get out of here."

"Huh?" Jeff responded, slowly sitting up and using his wrinkled tie to wipe the drool from his mouth and chin.

Not waiting until he realized what was going on, Gloria grabbed his arm and pulled him off the platform and out of the room. As they got to Lester's cell, Gloria turned to see that thankfully, the screen had changed to read _2693*_.

"We have to get Lester's attention," she told Jeff as she saw that Lester was sitting on the floor against the wall, with his back to the door.

"Lester!" Jeff called, knocking on the glass.

"It's soundproof, Jeff. He can't hear us," she pointed out.

"Oh, right," he recalled before jumping up and down, waving his arms like a crazed person.

Lester finally turned slightly to see them and instantly sprang to his feet, hope returning in his eyes. Gloria quickly motioned for him to look for the keypad by the door. When he did, she used her fingers to relay the numbers before mouthing 'star". She then sighed with relief as his door opened and she immediately started to turn around and run. Lester, however, acted quicker and embraced both of them gratefully. Jeff returned the embrace but Gloria gingerly put his arm around Lester for only a brief few seconds before taking off. "We have to leave, guys."

"Right behind you," Jeff and Lester replied in unison as they raced down the hall and out the back door.

As they continued running, Gloria mentally thanked Faison for coming to their rescue. She just hoped he wouldn't have to answer to Blackwell later.

* * *

"Okay. It's done. They should be free now."

"Great job, Chuck," Sarah encouraged with a smile as they sat inside Castle. "You successfully managed to hack Blackwell's security system and let them escape without us having to go directly to them."

Chuck sighed in relief and laced his fingers together. He still couldn't believe the information that Genral Beckman had found regarding Blackwell and Gloria. Not only were Gloria's foster parents spies with the CIA, but they had hidden a microchip which contained information that could prove detrimental if put into the wrong hands. And Blackwell was two of those wrong hands. He had battled Gloria's foster family for years and knew way too much. He wondered how she was taking the information he knew Blackwell was only happy to share. And how she had managed to survive being captured with Jeff and Lester. That in itself had to be absolute torture.

"I just can't believe she didn't activate the GPS tracker I gave her," Casey complained. "I thought she was smarter than that."

"Look, Casey; I'm sure she didn't use it because if we-well, you and Sarah-came in there guns a-blazin', Jeff and Lester would have a _lot_ of questions to ask. I don't know about you, but would _you_ want to be interrogated by those two?"

"They wouldn't dare," Casey growled, popping his knuckles. "Besides, a few knock-out drops and they probably wouldn't remember a thing. Only downside is, it might kill the remaining two brain cells those buffoons share."

"Aw, Casey; it's almost like for a split second, you seemed to _care_ ," Chuck teased, hiding his horror at the idea of using knock-out drops. He just hoped that Gloria would lay low until they could capture Blackwell and that she also had no idea that it was Chuck who rescued them. Ever since he saved her from the fire years ago, she hated feeling as if she needed rescuing. That's how Chuck also knew she would never have activated Casey's GPS tracker. But he couldn't tell _them_ that. Not without explaining the situation. Gloria had never told anyone about the fire and how it had affected her. He still was concerned at the fact that she was still having nightmares about it, so many years later. "Guys, if you don't mind, I think I'm going to go home. Hopefully I can talk to Gloria and find out how she's holding up," he told them, standing up and stretching.

Sarah stood up, as well. "Of course, Chuck. Please, give Gloria our best. I'm sure she is still reeling from everything that's happened earlier."

"Thanks. I will," he waved as he went upstairs. "Goodnight, guys."

* * *

"Ugh," Lester groaned as he shifted his position in bed for the umpteenth time. He had tried everything: tea, cuddling with his favorite stuffed elephant, begging his mom to sing him a lullaby. Nothing worked, however. His mind was too preoccupied with the kidnapping, the isolation, and most of all, _her_. Sitting up and running his hands over his face, he grabbed the remote by his bed and turned on his satellite radio. Maybe hearing good eighties music would calm his restless soul.

" _She's like the wind through my tree/She rides the night next to me/She leads me to moonlight/Only to burn me with the sun/She's taken my heart/But she doesn't know what she's done..._ " the crooning of Patrick Swayze's "She's Like the Wind" began immediately over the speaker.

 _Are you_ kidding _me right now?_ Lester thought bitterly before quickly snatching the remote and turning the power off. "Stuff a sock in it, Swayze," he muttered, flopping back down in bed defeatedly. "There is no way that I have feelings for that...woman. No way in hell. Isn't that right, Mr. Snuffles?" he asked, squeaking the stuffed elephant as a 'reply'. "That's right. That woman is gonna be the _death_ of me. I bet she's even turning Jeff against me right now. Well, I don't need _either_ of them. I will be just fine by myself."

But as Lester said those last words, he literally shuddered. He knew he didn't mean it; truth was, he was downright _terrified_ that complete and total loneliness was going to be an emotion he would feel all too soon.

* * *

Blackwell had been staring at the microchip for longer than Faison felt comfortable with. His boss was obsessed, that was for sure. But surely, he didn't expect her to really remember verbatim what her CIA mommy told her as a child. But it sure seemed that way. Almost every hour, he or Faison took Gloria out of the room for questioning. Which got them absolutely nowhere.

"Faison; go get Gloria and bring her here. I'm tired of playing Twenty-One Questions," Blackwell finally barked, taking his eyes off the chip momentarily.

"Boss, maybe she really doesn't remember," Faison heard himself say for at least the fifth time.

"You know, it's funny the things we can remember under extreme duress. Bring her to me. And bring that idiot brother of hers, as well. If I have to torture him to make her talk, so be it."

Faison held back a groan and headed back towards the isolation areas. As he turned the corner, however, he saw that two of the cells were open. One of them had the speaker torn out of the wall. The other one had something smaller busted into tiny pieces. The worst and most noticable thing of all, however, were that the three prisoners had escaped. "Son of a bitch," he said aloud, both relief and dread washing over him. Blackwell was _not_ going to be happy. Not at all. "Uh, boss? You might want to come here!"

"What is it, Faison?" he sighed in frustration.

"T-they're gone, sir. They escaped."

"Escaped? How in God's name did they escape?" Blackwell cried out, his face turning bright red. "Faison, this is _your_ fault! You were supposed to keep an eye on them!"

"Boss, unless they had the codes, there is no way they could have possibly-"

Suddenly, they turned to the giant screen on the wall and saw a message that simply read: Leave Them Alone...Or Else.

Faison couldn't help it. "Or else what?" he asked.

"You _moron_! Someone hacked into our system and helped them escape! And you _let_ them do it!" Blackwell screamed, smacking the back of Faison's head.

"I-I-" he stammered, but it was no use. He knew Blackwell would not take this lying down. He was out for blood. Faison just hoped it wouldn't be _his_ blood.


	12. Chapter 12

Jeff yawned as he opened up his invitation to fellow Buy More employee Skip's birthday party later that night. After escaping from crazy bread stealing kidnappers yesterday, all he wanted to do was come to work and do nothing. Lester had been called out on an install job and Gloria was coming in a little later. It was just him manning the Nerd Herd desk. Well, almost...

"Hey, Jeff; I heard about what happened yesterday. Are you guys alright?" Chuck asked as he walked in the store and stopped at the Nerd Herd counter.

"We're fine. I don't remember much. I still wish they had pumpernickel," he replied in a monotone.

Chuck gave him a strange look before continuing. "Well, I heard through the grapevine that the kidnapper and that other guy working with him were apprehended last night. Good thing, huh?"

"Yeah. So, are you going to Skip's birthday party tonight?"

"Sure, yeah. You?"

"I might. Hopefully he'll have a naked lady jump out of the cake. Now _that's_ what I call a birthday wish come true. Butter-creme frosting is kind of an aphrodisiac of mine."

"O-kay, not really something I needed to know, but now I'm rooting for whipped icing," Chuck ran a hand through his hair. "Well, I'll be in the back if you need anything."

"You got it," Jeff nodded before leaning back in his chair and propping his feet up. As much as he liked being alone with no one to bug him, he really wanted to talk to Lester. He had been extremely quiet after they had escaped. He barely said more than three words during the taxi ride home, which Jeff had to pay for. Lester _still_ wasn't quite himself today, either. He looked as if he hadn't slept a wink and when asked to leave on an install, he left with no usual argument or groaning. A shiver went up Jeff's spine as he thought that perhaps his best friend was...maturing. Ugh; how horrible would _that_ be?

Suddenly, the doors opened and Lester walked through, holding a large paper sack in his hands. Jeff sat up, taking note that Lester was wearing his rose-colored sunglasses and looking much more like the pal he knew.

"How was it?" Jeff asked as soon as Lester came up beside him.

"Piece of cake. Look what _I_ got," Lester sang as he pulled the item from the sack. "Some delicious pumpernickel bread for my good buddy."

Jeff saw the bread and wiped his mouth. "Oh, boy." He looked at the bread longingly as he held it. "I'm going to devour you like the naughty bread that you are. Or would you prefer I eat you nice and slow?"

"Uh, Jefferson? _That_ was officially creepy. Please keep all further provocative comments regarding grains of any kind to yourself. I'm going on break."

Jeff was about to reply when Emmett came up, seemingly from out of thin air. "Go ahead, Jeffrey; I'll keep an eye on things until Gloria gets here."

Jeff smiled, not paying attention to the unorthodox eagerness of the assistant manager's help. "Cool. Thanks. Hey, Lester; wait up!"

* * *

Morgan immediately spotted Gloria as soon as she walked through the front doors. "Gloria, hey; I heard you, Jeff and Lester had a bit of a scare from some crazy guy yesterday."

Gloria smiled thinly. "Yeah, but we're fine. No big deal. If you'll excuse me-"

"Glad to hear it. Jeff really thought you were going to murder Lester after he stole your necklace at the party and-"

Gloria spun around and Morgan noticed a vein in her forehead began to show. "Morgan, I have to work now. Thanks for your concern, but I am fine."

Morgan nodded, slightly hurt, and turned around to walk away. _Oh, right; Chuck wanted me to remind her about the birthday party tonight,_ he remembered, turning back around, mouth open and heart in his throat.

"Well, good _afternoon_ , Gloria," Emmett welcomed her before Morgan could say anything. Instantly, he knew this wasn't going to be a pleasant conversation. Emmett's voice sounded too...syrupy sweet. "I was wondering if you could assist a customer with the lighters," he concluded, flicking a lighter inches from Gloria's face.

Gloria gasped and jumped back. "C-can't you find someone else to help with t-that?" she stammered, not daring to look at the flame.

"Oh, but they asked for you _specifically_ ," Emmett grinned like a Cheshire cat. "Wouldn't want to have to... _fire_...you for insubordination."

"You l-leave me alone, Millbarge. Are you forgetting what I have in my purse?" she threatened, but Morgan could tell from the look on her face that she was losing her ground.

"What's the matter, Gloria? I thought you liked playing with _fire_. Guess you just got _burned_ one too many times. And sadly this time, there's no good samaritan to _save_ you," he replied before taking a small piece of paper and holding the lighter close to it.

Morgan looked from Gloria to Emmett. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he knew it was really bad. The color had completely drained from her face and she was literally shaking.

Finally, Gloria shoved Emmett with all her might. "I _hate_ you!" she cried before running off to the back of the store.

"You, sir, are a despicable human being," Morgan told a stunned Emmett before he ran after her.

* * *

Lester was in the break room with Jeff, discussing Skip's birthday party and how lame it would be unless they could find a way for Skip to get laid.

"We'd either have to blindfold her or get her totally and completely wasted first," he said.

"I know a pimp that owes me a favor," Jeff chimed in, receiving a disturbing look from Lester.

Suddenly, before he could respond, he saw a blur of a woman run through the break room and straight into the bathroom. "Glor...," he started, standing up and staring at the bathroom door. "That _was_ Gloria, wasn't it?"

"I think so."

The door opened again and this time, it was Morgan, looking concerned. "Did you guys see Gloria come through this way?"

Instantly, both Lester and Jeff pointed to the bathroom.

"Aw, man." Morgan looked back and forth from the bathroom to the break room door. "Guys, she's really upset. I can't just leave her alone in there."

"What happened?" Jeff asked. Lester wanted to, but bit his tongue and sighed with relief when Jeff did it _for_ him.

"Emmett...need I say more?"

Lester grinned wickedly. "I wish you would."

Morgan took a deep breath. "Guys, I am about to go where no man-well, no Buy More man-has ever gone before. Wish me luck."

"Do it, Morgan. Waltz in there with your head held high and don't let the screams deter you from your mission," Lester told him, pumping his fist in the air.

"If you find a small camera in there, I know nothing," Jeff added.

Morgan rolled his eyes and marched inside, leaving Lester looking on in disbelief. "Does this woman have _everyone_ under her spell?" he muttered as Jeff quickly got up and pressed his ear to the door.

"What are they saying?" he whispered after a few minutes.

Jeff opened his mouth to answer, but he instantly fell to the floor when the break room door flew open and Big Mike entered.

"Barnes, what in the hell are you doing on the floor? You know what? Never mind. I don't wanna know. Just get back to work; both of you."

Lester stood up. "You got it." As he started to pass by Big Mike, however, he couldn't resist. "Oh, by the way; Morgan is hanging out in the women's bathroom. Again."

As Lester passed and heard Big Mike yell Morgan's name, he chuckled. At least he would get the last laugh _this_ time. Not to mention it took his mind off his genuine concern for Gloria's well-being.

* * *

"Gloria? Please don't hurt me," Morgan called out as he passed by the stalls, eyes closed.

Gloria hiccupped before she exited the last stall. She couldn't believe Morgan had followed her in the bathroom to check on her. But she knew he heard the whole thing. "What are you doing in here?" she sniffed.

"I had to see if you were alright," he replied. "I'm really sorry about Emmett. He's a total douchebag."

Gloria wiped her eyes with a wad of toilet paper. "Yeah. He is. Follow me; there's a secret door in the third stall that leads out of here. You don't need to get into trouble."

As the two of them entered the third stall and she pushed open a narrow door in the wall by the toilet, she felt her face get hot with embarrassment all over again. Emmett must have done extensive research on her to find out about her being rescued from the fire as a teen and the effect it had on her both then and now. How the firemen and paramedics couldn't get her to stop screaming long after it was over or how she even stopped breathing a few times from severe panic attacks. At least Emmett would never know about the nightmares she was having presently.

Finally, the two of them reached the long hallway at the back of the store and sat down on the tile floor. Gloria found it almost comforting as she revealed to Morgan the reason behind her fear and even the secret that the good samaritan was Chuck Bartowski, himself. "So, apparently Emmett now knows my intense fear of fire and why it haunts me."

"Wow; I mean...wow. I'm so sorry you went through that but I'm glad Chuck was there. I always knew my best pal was a hero."

Gloria smiled. "Yeah. And that incident sparked our friendship. He introduced me to his family and took me under his wing since at the time, I didn't know any of my real family. Because of Chuck and his fantastic computer skills, he helped me locate my mom. Well, Jeff's mom, too. I can definitely see Mom in Jeff. They are some kooky characters; but then again, so am I on occasion."

"Indeed they are. So I've noticed you and Jeff have gotten pretty close lately. Can't imagine that's going over too well with Lester."

"No. He pretty much thinks I'm scum. I haven't exactly been nice to him, either but he stole something valuable from me. That's hard to get past. And all because he has some ridiculous theory that I am trying to come between him and Jeff. I have absolutely no intention of doing that; never did. I'm not that cruel."

Morgan stood up and helped her up, as well. "I know that and _Jeff_ knows that. But have you told that to _Lester_?"

Gloria scratched her head and looked at Morgan, realizing he had a very valid point. She had said it aloud, but not to Lester's face. "No, I haven't. But that's going to change. I need to let Lester know that I'm not a monster. And tonight at Skip's birthday party seems like the perfect time."

Morgan nodded. "Good. You're a good person, Gloria. Jeff is lucky to have you as a half-sister."

Gloria smiled, tears welling up in her eyes. "Thank you. You are a great guy, too. I feel terrible that I wasn't nicer to you in school. I actually was jealous of you. You and Chuck were best friends. You were always part of the family and I really wanted to be, too."

"You _were_. We were all just a little afraid of you," Morgan chuckled slightly.

Gloria threw her head back and laughed. She was really thankful that Morgan came to her rescue. He really wasn't such a bad guy, after all. Now she just needed to repair the damage between her and Lester before he tried to shove her out of the picture for good. And as much as she felt bad for Lester, she didn't take well to shoving of any kind. And Emmett Millbarge would learn that very soon. Very soon indeed.


	13. Chapter 13

Faison laid on the bottom cot in his jail cell and sighed. How he wished he had made better choices in his life. If he could only stand up to Blackwell, he'd be free. Or dead. Too bad he was more of a coward who would rather be shackled to a weirdo like Blackwell than be a corpse. But a part of him was glad Gloria, Lester and the drunken man escaped. He didn't know how they did it, but he was glad. It was so tiring going back and forth to get Gloria just so she could tell them she didn't remember what that stupid tiny chip did. Faison knew she would never remember, but Blackwell insisted she knew or would remember if given the right inspiration. Too bad they would never find out while in this jail cell. Just the thought of it made Faison smile.

"Psst...do you see any of the guards?"

Faison raised up his head. So much for peace. "Yeah, boss. Why?"

Blackwell jumped down off the top bunk. "Because we are getting out of here, that's why. You know, it's amazing that the police don't _always_ check everywhere for tools used for escape." With that, Faison saw him in the dim light pull out a tiny device, no larger than a stubby pencil.

"What is that and do I even want to know where you hid it?"

"It's going to help us escape and no, you don't," Blackwell retorted as he flipped open the bottom section and pushed a button, causing a very hot flame to appear.

 _A tiny thermal lance?_ Faison thought in both fear and admiration.

"We're gonna burn our way through this hellhole. Then, we continue to search for Gloria. Anyone who gets in our way will be disposed of. However, consider yourself lucky I am letting you come with me."

"I wish I wasn't," Faison muttered under his breath.

Blackwell turned to him. "What was that?"

Faison coughed. "Nothing. Just some phlegm in my throat. This place really does a number on my sinuses." There went that lack of courage again. Instead, Faison only continued to watch his psycho boss work with his tiny tool so they could escape. Just to torment that poor girl yet again. The very same girl a part of him wanted to save.

* * *

 _This party is absolutely abhorrant. The fact that I am even_ sitting _here just screams 'loser',_ Lester thought bitterly as he sat at a table in the banquet room of a swanky hotel for Skip's party. The DJ played crappy songs, Skip's dad checked _everyone_ beforehand for alcohol, and what was even worse, everyone seemed to still be having a good time. Jeff got busted for trying to sneak his infamous jail juice in, but even after it was confiscated, Jeff was smiling and laughing with everyone else, dancing with his shirt off. Chuck and Morgan were chatting it up with Sarah and Ana, while Casey was eating what looked to be an entire chicken. He tried not to notice her, but everywhere he looked, he saw Gloria, laughing, talking and dancing. He couldn't deny she looked hot, even in her Mickey Mouse t-shirt, plain blue baseball cap, tight blue jeans and combat boots. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw that Chuck was keeping a close eye on her. "Back off, Bartowski; you've got a hot piece of ass already," he muttered under his breath as he took a long drink of punch.

"Ahem."

Lester froze as soon as he felt someone's presence and slowly looked up. "Can I help you?" he said in a totally uninterested tone.

"I've been looking for you. We need to talk."

"Gloria, Gloria, Gloria; there is nothing we need to talk about. Now if you'd like for me to get a room so we can do anything _but_ talk, I might be persuaded." He made sure to give her his most intriguing 'I dare you' look. He had to push her away. After all, she couldn't stand him anyway. What did he have to lose?

Gloria shook her head no, but extended her hand to him. "Dance with me."

Suddenly, the music changed to a slow song, but Gloria didn't retract her hand. Lester looked at her hand before slowly placing his in hers and letting her lead him to the dance floor. As soon as they began to dance, he placed his hand on her butt, but she quickly adjusted it to the middle of her back. Lester tried not to get too lost in the scent of her perfume or the fact that he just now noticed that she was at least a couple of inches taller than himself, more so in the boots.

"Lester, I need you to know something," she began.

"You want me in a way that you have never wanted a man before? Trust me; your secret is safe with me," he replied in a low voice before making a growling noise.

"Lester, be serious for one minute, okay? Or better yet, just let me do the talking. Regardless of what you may or may not believe, I am _not_ trying to turn Jeff against you or make him choose between you or I. I may have found out that he and I share the same mother, but you and Jeff have been friends for a long time. You know him better and he knows _you_ better. You and Jeff are a package deal. I get that and I admire it. I have never had that connection with anyone. Sure, Chuck and I were close, but Morgan was and will always be his best friend. When I was in high school, I was jealous of Morgan and how connected he was to Chuck and his family. All I've ever wanted is a family and to belong. Jeff is my half-brother and if he considers you his best friend, then I am fine with that. I know you stole my necklace to get back at me because you thought I was getting in the way or going to try to replace you in Jeff's life, but that can't be farther from the truth. Please believe me."

As soon as she was finished, Lester swallowed the lump in his throat. _Don't tear up; Patel, do not cry,_ he scolded himself mentally. How could this woman be so...infuriatingly wonderful? He had let his guard down with her earlier by accident when he hugged her after their escape, but he couldn't do that again. He _had_ to find something to hate her for. He had to keep those walls up. Besides, it's not as if she felt anything for him. She had made that very clear back at the warehouse. But yet, here she was, pouring her heart out while slow-dancing with him and looking astonishingly beautiful to boot. What on Earth was he supposed to do _now_?

"Um, Lester? The music stopped," she told him, slowly pulling away from him.

"Oh...oh, yeah. I knew that," he responded before clearing his throat. "Well, I appreciate your honesty and with that, I bid you adieu. Jeffrey and I need to go home and figure out how to sabatoge a certain Ass Man."

"Why would you sabatoge Emmett? What did he do to you?"

 _He hurt you and made you cry,_ his mind screamed. "Because he lives and breathes, that's why. I'd ask you to come along but this scheme is best left to the professionals."

Gloria smiled. "I see. Well, I need to ditch this party, too. Night, Lester."

Lester walked away, not daring to look back as he did. What was _happening_ to him? How could he want to push her away and yet keep her close at the same time? _Good thing I'm not_ falling _for her or anything,_ he thought. _How ridiculous would_ that _be?_

* * *

"Hey, buddy; was that Gloria dancing with Lester a minute ago?" Chuck asked Morgan as they stood by the punch bowl.

"Indeed it was, Chuck. I might have had something to do with that. I told her to tell Lester that she had no intentions of taking Lester's place with Jeff, you see. I think that's why Lester is acting out. He feels that Gloria is moving in on his territory, so to speak."

"As long as it's nothing more than that," Chuck responded with a shudder.

Morgan laughed. "Are you kidding me right now? Surely you're kidding me. There is no _way_ Gloria could be falling in love with Lester and Lester doesn't even have the _capability_ to fall in love. The only things _that_ guy is in love with is money and power. Two things in which he does not have. But I can't help wonder if there _is_ such a woman out there who could tame the cold and ashen heart of one Lester Patel."

"Well, I just want Gloria to stay out of trouble. And we all know Jeff and Lester are trouble with a capital T."

"And that rhymes with P and that stands for pool," Morgan joked. "Sorry, buddy. Couldn't resist."

Chuck watched as Lester and Jeff left the party in Jeff's van and wondered if it was possible that Lester's obsession with women could actually turn into anything serious. Nah. The odds of that were about as slim as Jeff acting sober. And Chuck knew that would never happen in a million years.


	14. Chapter 14

**Sorry this chapter is a little late. Had been recovering from a back injury as well as other goings-on. But better late than never...right?**

"You used to call me paranoid...pressure; but even you cannot avoid...pressure," Lester sang melodramatically as Jeff jammed out the melody on his keytar. Jeffster was getting ready to perform in a few days at the Buy More's annual Slash Sale. It was not only a huge sale on certain items, but there were to be multiple contests and door prizes, as well. Big Mike had _finally_ given the okay for Jeffster to perform, but they needed a song. They had scratched out "Don't Bring Me Down" by ELO, "A Horse With No Name" by America, and "Ashes to Ashes" by David Bowie. Jeff thought they had finally found the perfect song with "Pressure" by Billy Joel. Together with Lester, it sounded fantastic. However, there was one snag at that moment. She was sitting on her sofa across from their makeshift stage in her living room.

"So? What do ya think?" Lester asked after he had finished.

Jeff looked over and noticed Gloria was playing listlessly with the hem of her shirt. "Gloria?"

Suddenly, she jumped and looked up at them. "Oh! Yeah...yeah; that was...great, guys. You were great as Elton John."

Lester clicked his tongue impatiently. "That was Billy Joel. How could you not know your John from your Joel?"

"Joel...Joel. I knew that. You know what? I'm going to make some tea. You guys want any?" she stood up quickly and hurried into the kitchen.

"What is _wrong_ with her, Jeff? She is _totally_ ruining our mojo," Lester whispered.

Jeff knew that she was worried ever since Chuck had informed her that Blackwell and his sidekick had escaped from prison. It had been a week without incident, but Jeff knew she was upset over that and the fact that everyone had been smothering her.

"I need to stay at _my_ place, Chuck; I can't continue living with you, Ellie and Awesome," she had told him after he had insisted she stay with him.

"I get that you want that, Gloria; really I do, but-" Chuck had interjected. Jeff had offered to let Gloria stay with him, as did Lester, albeit a bit too eagerly. Those suggestions were quickly shot down quicker than Old Yeller.

"Chuck, I love that you want me to have protection twenty-four seven, but I don't need you or anyone else to save me, okay? I can't always live as the damsel in distress!" she had cried before storming out. Jeff, Lester, and Chuck looked at each other and shrugged. None of them quite understood what she was talking about. Most damsels _liked_ to be saved, but not Gloria.

"Oh, great; now _you're_ spacing out on me," Lester barked, jerking Jeff back into the present.

"Sorry."

"Tea's ready!" Gloria called out happily before snapping her fingers. "Oh, shoot. I forgot something. You guys stay here and enjoy your tea and I'll be back in a jiffy. Gotta go...run an errand really quick."

"But-" Jeff called out, but she was already halfway out the door.

"You didn't give her any of your 'special' juice, did you?" Lester asked when they were alone.

"No. But maybe she could _use_ some," Jeff responded before making a face. "I hate tea."

"Well, then whaddaya say we take a look around, huh? Let's just see if Gloria has any kinky fetishes hidden deep within her boudoir."

Jeff looked at him for a minute before following his friend in a mad dash upstairs.

"Exactly how many women's bedrooms have we been inside?" Jeff asked as they reached her room and opened the door.

"Without permission? Tons, Jeffrey. One day, we might get invited, but until then, _this_ is how we roll."

The two of them walked inside and found that it looked decently neat. Only a few things were out of place, but Jeff could tell from Lester's face, he was disappointed there was nothing silky or lacy lying about. Jeff walked over to her full length mirror and saw that several photos were taped around the edges. Jeff noticed as he looked at one from high school, that even then, she enjoyed wearing baseball caps and vintage t-shirts.

"Ugh. Even _then_ she voluntarily shackled herself to Bartowski," Lester noted distastefully.

Jeff walked over to her bedside table where a box of tissues sat atop some papers and envelopes were stacked. "Ah-choo!" he sneezed and reached for the tissues. "Oops," he said when he accidentally knocked the box off the table, as well as some papers.

"Well, well, well; what have we _here_?" Lester asked as he rushed over to pick up a newspaper clipping. "Girl Rescued From House Fire By Good Samaritan", he read the headline.

Jeff looked over his shoulder as they read the article in silence. "Lester, maybe we shouldn't be in here," he said finally after they finished reading it.

"Y-yeah. Let's go," Lester agreed as they quickly folded the paper and placed it back with the others.

As soon as they got back downstairs, Jeff felt a mix of emotions tug at his heartstrings. As he looked at Lester, he knew he felt the same.

"Did we really just read that article or was it some sort of tea-induced illusion?" Lester asked. "What happened to her was bad enough, but what kind of father-foster or otherwise-would say those things or let them go to _print_?"

"Makes my parents throwing pineapples at me seem like nothing," Jeff added. _But it all makes sense now why she doesn't like to be rescued._

* * *

John Casey was cleaning one of his many assault rifles when he heard a knock at the door. Growling audibly, knowing it was probably Chuck or another pesky neighbor, he begrudgingly answered the door. The person on the other side was the last person he expected, however.

"Gloria?" he grunted, thinking she had seen Blackwell or his goon.

"Hi, Casey. Sorry to, uh, bother you without calling first, but I just needed to ask you a question."

He noticed she looked nervous, biting her lip and wringing her hands. "Yeah. Come on in," he told her.

She gingerly walked in and looked around, noticing all the ammunition on one wall in the next room. "I see you've decorated accordingly," she smirked before turning around to face him. "Okay, so I'll make this quick. I wanted to ask you because, well, you're a spy and I know you won't ask me a million questions like Chuck would, so here goes: do you think it's weak if you need rescuing?"

"Huh?" Casey found himself saying aloud. What on Earth would make her ask such a question? And to _him_ of all people. "I think Sarah would be a better person to ask, don't you?"

"Casey, please," she begged, sounding desperate. "I'm asking _you_. Do you think it's weak for someone to need rescuing?"

Casey looked at her as she sat down. He could tell that this had been plaguing her for a while. "No, I don't. Everyone needs rescuing at some point. Whether it be from a hostage situation or when fifty Swiss militia army members have you surrounded."

"O-kay," she responded slowly to his answer. "So have you felt helpless or weak when you have needed Sarah or Chuck to rescue you?"

"Who says they have had to _rescue_ me?" he asked, a certain bitterness in his tone.

Gloria said nothing but her eyes said it all. She knew the truth.

"Alright, fine. Do I wish that I could've been able to handle the situation myself? Hell yeah. But truth is, I know Walker and...Bartowski have my back if I'm in trouble. It goes the other way, too. It happens. You just gotta learn from it. Why do you ask?"

Gloria habitually reached up to where her necklace used to be and looked down. My foster parents-who I recently learned were CIA-felt I was weak and helpless because of a...situation that happened when I was a teenager. I nearly died and someone had to rescue me. It's haunted me ever since, but not just for what happened. It was what my foster parents said afterwards. My father said 'Gloria; I'm very disappointed in you. You showed weakness and cowardice when you let that strange kid rescue you. In this family, we don't need saving. We save _ourselves_ ; so you need to stop allowing others to come to your aid. You don't need anyone else but yourself to survive. I'm ashamed that you let us down. Foster child or not, you have betrayed our legacy'."

Casey was floored. Not only at what her father had told her but that she imitated her father's voice as she quoted him. "He _told_ you this? And hopefully in a better voice."

"Word for word," she replied softly.

"Well, no disrespect intended, but your father is an ass. You gotta get that man out of your head. He's arrogant and cruel because he feels he has a reputation to uphold. But you are your own person. You shouldn't feel ashamed to ask for help. No one should." Casey felt his blood boiling at the thought of anyone saying that to a young girl. Just what kind of father _was_ he? Did he agree to foster Gloria out of pity or was he hoping she, too, would become a spy?

Gloria stood up and hugged him, much to his surprise and annoyance. "Thanks, Casey. Don't tell Chuck or anyone that I talked to you about this, okay?"

Casey nodded, still feeling the ghost of her embrace. As he watched her leave, he realized how truly messed up her childhood must've been. Chuck had told him certain parts, like the fact she lived in constant fear they would place her back in foster care, but he had no idea they put so much pressure on her growing up. "Someone else had parents like that," he said aloud. "Oh, yeah. Patel's parents," he recalled a few seconds later with a shudder.

* * *

"Okay; favorite movie," Morgan announced before taking a drink at Bennigan's. Morgan had agreed to come after work with Lester, Jeff and Gloria since everyone else had other plans. Chuck and Sarah had a date and Ellie and Awesome wanted some alone time. But as bummed as he was at first, seeing Gloria feel more like herself made him happy. And it seemed to have affected Jeff and Lester, as well. Morgan had almost forgotten that they could occasionally be fun.

"I know Gloria's," Jeff wiped the back of his hand over his mouth. " _Dirty Dancing_."

Gloria threw back her head and laughed. "Wrong! I said I liked dirty dancing-as in the Lambada."

Lester smiled wickedly. "Ooh, show us what you _got_ , mama."

"You wish. My favorite movies are as follows: _Attack of the Killer Tomatoes_ , _Megamind_ , and _Robocop_."

"You are a worldly woman of film, there, Gloria," Morgan laughed. "A B-movie, a CGI movie and a blow-em-up movie of the nineteen eighties."

"What can I say? I'm deep," she grinned. "Okay, I have one; favorite female singer. Lester, I know yours. You adore Tina Turner."

Lester snorted as Morgan snickered. "What? I do _not_!"

Gloria rolled her eyes. "Oh, please. Every time you hear her on the radio or see her photograph, you drool worse than Jeff when they show off the new female mannequins in the window display of Bloomingdale's."

"Those mannequins are smokin' hot. Even _without_ genitalia," Jeff said, his eyes glazing over.

Lester moved his chair further from Jeff and Morgan took a long drink of his beer. Gloria just put her hand over her face and shook her head.

"I think that deserves another buffalo wing," Gloria said, reaching over to the large basket in the middle of the table.

Morgan watched as Lester did the same and their hands brushed. Gloria instantly pulled hers away but Lester's hand hovered in place. In fact, Lester completely froze, but his cheeks flushed somewhat. Usually, Lester would have made some sort of uncomfortable and inappropriate comment, but he continued to sit perfectly still, his eyes locked on his hand. "Lester? Are you okay?" Morgan finally asked.

"I gotta go to the-I'll be back," Lester suddenly stuttered, jumping up so quickly, he knocked his chair over.

Morgan looked to Gloria who just smiled uncomfortably. "When you gotta go, you gotta go, I guess."

"I guess," Morgan repeated but if he didn't know any better, he would think that Lester was beginning to fall for Gloria. He had known Lester a long time and he had never seen him act this way. Both Jeff and Gloria were clueless but Morgan knew something was going on. Something very strange yet wonderful yet painful. After all, Gloria had already expressed little to no interest in Lester romantically. Whatever he was feeling for Gloria, Morgan feared Lester would just wind up with his heart broken. And by Jeff's own half-sister, nonetheless. Meaning the worst possible scenario: Jeff would _have_ to choose between Lester or his half-sister.


	15. Chapter 15

**Again, I apologize for the delay. These last couple of weeks have been crazy. I hope to have the next chapter up much sooner, because we are getting closer to the big climax and then the ending!**

"I must admit, I am impressed, Gloria," Big Mike began with a giant-sized smile as he walked over to her near the washer and dryers. "You have sold over twelve thousand dollars worth of merchandise and your shift isn't even over."

Gloria smiled in return, a bit crimson showing in her cheeks. "Thanks." The truth was, she _did_ feel on top of her game today. As much as she liked Jeff and Lester, she did not share in their work ethic. At least not today. She felt she needed to keep herself as busy as possible so she wouldn't have to converse with Emmett or think about her recurring nightmare. Last night's was by far the most bizarre. Not only could she not see teenage Chuck or hear his voice, but she felt as if she were having an out of body experience. She could feel herself literally floating above as she watched the scene play out, herself and Chuck only as shadows and distorted voices. And in the distance, another distorted voice crying "please don't leave me!". It was still terrifying enough to cause her to wake up screaming, but she felt more confused than anything. What did the changes _mean_? Was her nightmare slowly fading away? Would it reveal a horror far worse than anything that happened that day? It was all too much. So, her only therapy was to sell merchandise as if her life depended on it. And thankfully, it was working like a charm.

"Keep up the good work. The others could _learn_ something from watching you," Big Mike continued before heading back to his office.

"Oh, yes. We're watching so closely. Teach us more, O' Wise Acre," Lester joked as he came up behind her.

"Get out of here before I have Fernando throw you in the washing machine," she rolled her eyes.

Lester scoffed. "Fernando? Are you kidding me? I could take him with one arm tied behind my-oh; _hey_ , Fernando. We were just talking about you. How are ya, buddy?"

Gloria giggled as Fernando walked by, giving Lester a warning look. "I'm going to head to the back for a minute. Do you need me to have Jeff watch your back?"

This time, it was Lester who gave her a warning look before Gloria shook her head and walked toward the stockroom.

"Yes, I just saw her go into the stockroom. Is she in trouble?" she heard Emmett ask with far too much enthusiasm from the hallway a few minutes later.

"I'm not in trouble, you moron; I'm doing my _job_ ," she muttered to herself.

Suddenly, she felt something cold against her lower spine and she stood straighter, not daring to breathe. "Lester, if this is you, it's not funny."

"Oh, it's not Lester," Blackwell's unwelcome voice snarled. "You are coming with me."

"And why should I? Other than the fact that you have a gun to my back, of course."

"Because I have your parents, Gloria. Unless you want them dead, you are walking out with me. Nice and slow. Not calling attention to yourself or signaling your friends. Got it?"

Gloria gasped. Blackwell escaped from prison and managed to kidnap her _parents_? She _knew_ he was planning something since he had escaped with Faison, but _this_? Without another word, she walked toward the stockroom door, Blackwell beside her in full police uniform, gun in her side.

"Hey, shouldn't you arrest her and read her the Miranda Rights or something?" Emmett asked as they walked by.

"Read _this_ , jerkface," Blackwell retorted before shoving Emmett, causing him to stumble back against the wall and crash to the floor.

Gloria cheered mentally for a split second before remembering that Blackwell kidnapped her parents and was planning on harming them. "We'll go out the back as to not cause attention," he told her.

 _Come on, somebody. I need to see at least one person so I can use them as a distraction to get the upper hand,_ she thought to herself as they exited. But as Blackwell shoved her in the trunk of his car, she realized that no one would even know she had gone. It was up to her to not only rescue herself, but her parents as well.

* * *

Faison had never ran so quickly in his life as he did when he made his way to the Buy More. His chest and head felt as if they were on fire but he continued on until he literally skidded to a stop at the Nerd Herd desk.

Lester and Jeff looked up, both shocked to see a sweaty and panting Faison.

"You have...come with me...Blackwell...Gloria...he's leading her to a trap...gone too far..." Faison attempted to say in between gasps of air.

"You'll have to talk more clearly; we don't speak Panting Moronese," Lester sneered.

"I think he said 'we have to come with him. Blackwell took Gloria and he's leading her to a trap and that he's gone too far'," Jeff answered, not catching onto Lester's sarcasm.

Faison nodded rapidly. "Yes! We have to hurry!"

"And why should we trust _you_? After all, you're nothing more than Blackwell's bitch," Lester crossed his arms defiantly.

Suddenly, Emmett hobbled over, gingerly rubbing his back. "Guys, there was a policeman that came and took Gloria with him, but I'm not completely certain he was legitimate. I was going to mace his ass, but he threatened to beat her with his billy club. As all of you know, I never would encourage _violence_ , so-"

"He's telling the truth," Jeff suddenly announced. "If there was a real cop here, I'd smell him. They all smell the same: like stale coffee and three-day old eclairs."

"Wait a minute; you two can't just-" Emmett began as Lester and Jeff jumped over the Nerd Herd desk to join Faison.

Suddenly, without warning, Faison pushed Emmett down on the floor. "I know where he's taken her," he told them before they ran off.

"Would everyone stop _shoving_ me, dammit?" Emmett shouted behind them, still on the floor.

* * *

Lester jumped in the passenger side of Faison's car after yelling "Shotgun!", although to be honest, he didn't really care. His main concern was Gloria. _He'd better not be planning to harm her or...or..._

"What exactly is he...planning to _do_ to her?" he finally said aloud to quieten his stuttering thoughts.

"He's taking her to an abandoned shack off of Lyndell Street. He's going to tell her that he kidnapped her parents and have them held there. But he doesn't. What he _does_ have is a bomb. A bomb with a timer. After he leads her inside, he'll trap her and then set the timer for five minutes. He says if she won't tell him what he wants to know, she'll just have to die," Faison informed them as they flew down the highway.

"Wait a minute; this car looks familiar. Where have I seen it before?" Jeff asked, as if he had no idea how much danger his half-sister was in.

"Of _course_ this car looks _familiar_ , Jefferson!" Lester gritted his teeth. "It's the same car that chased your precious Loretta!"

"Oh, yeah," Jeff nodded in recollection.

"Focus, Jeffrey; focus! Gloria is in danger of immense proportion because of a psycho who believes she has the memory of a _pachyderm_!"

"He thinks I am going to get supplies but I can't do this anymore. I draw the line at killing her. I was too afraid to stand up to him before, but he's completely out of line!" Faison told them.

Lester snorted. "Yeah, cause tricking us, letting us hang by our wrists, and locking us in air-tight chambers wasn't out of line in the _least_."

Faison narrowed his eyes. "I'm sorry, okay? I didn't know her. I thought maybe she really _did_ know what that microchip did."

"She doesn't. If she knew, she would have told me," Jeff relayed. "Families don't keep secrets from each other. At least that's what _she_ said."

Lester licked his lips nervously and raised the collar of his shirt over his neck. He knew they needed to save her, but _how_? His mind was racing as fast as his heart. He and Jeff needed a plan. But could they trust Faison? Lester had gone down that road before. But now, money was the farthest thing from his mind as they sped towards Lyndell Street. _I have to rescue Gloria...for Jeff, anyway. With their mom in prison and Jeff's real sister disowning him, they are all they have left. Just never let it be said that Lester Patel was always completely selfish,_ he told himself. As he looked in the rear-view mirror at Jeff, however, he noticed that his best friend looked completely different. His shoulders were squared, as was his jaw, and his eyes stared straight ahead, looking more focused and alive than they had in a while. In fact, Jeff looked one-hundred percent determined and ready for battle. So why was Lester-the cool, calm, and collected of the two-sweating, shaking, and feeling as if his heart might explode?


	16. Chapter 16

_Oh God; where the hell_ am _I?_ Gloria wondered as she felt the car finally stop. To her, it seemed as if she had been stashed in the trunk for hours, but she knew in reality, it had only been maybe forty-five minutes at the most. She hadn't panicked at the thought of being stuffed into a dark confined space, but now that the car was no longer moving, she felt a lump of fear rising in her throat. Mostly because of the uncertainty of where Blackwell had taken her, but also at the thought of seeing her foster parents for the first time since she was eighteen. Would they even accept her help at this point or would they shun her completely?

Suddenly, Blackwell opened the trunk and Gloria flinched as she looked up into the sunlight. "We have arrived," he told her, roughly grabbing her and pulling her out of the trunk.

Gloria rubbed her neck and looked to see they were at just an old abandoned building. Nothing fancy. A couple of the windows were missing and a few of the boards on the outside walls were rotting. " _This_ is where you are holding them?"

"Yes. And if you want to see them alive, you'll shut up and move along," he barked before shoving her ahead of him. "And remember who has the gun."

 _If Chuck, Casey, and Sarah weren't preoccupied with another mission, they would have stopped you long before you found my parents,_ she mentally threatened.

As she walked inside, she saw a few tables scattered around and a single chair. Multiple columns were lined throughout to hold the building up and old newspapers were scattered on the floor. Other than a few lit candelabras on some of the tables, it was completely dark. And cold. This place was less than a step from being rubble and she visibly shivered from the instability. "M-mom? Dad?" she called out to the empty area.

No answer. "Where are they, Blackwell? Where are my parents?"

"Maybe they have already died," he chuckled.

"Dad! Mom?" she called again. "They're not here, are they? You _lied_ to me!" she cried out, tears welling in her eyes as she prepared to turn around for a fight.

Before she could, however, she felt something hard hit her in the head and the world went black.

* * *

Jeff looked out the window as Faison continued driving to where Blackwell was holding Gloria. He had no idea what the three of them could do, but there was no way he could have just stayed at the Buy More. But could he, Lester and Faison really diffuse a bomb? Probably not. Still, there had to be _something_...

Suddenly, an area to the left caught his attention and his eyes grew wide. "Stop the car!"

Faison screeched to a halt. "What is it?"

"I need to check out that junkyard," he responded.

"A _junkyard_? Your step or half-sister is in trouble and you want to browse in a _dump_?" Faison asked, dumbfounded.

"Garbage is my life," Jeff nodded.

"Just do it," Lester sighed. "Maybe we can find something in there to help. Like a depressed superhero in need of some life-altering encouragement and Irish Spring."

Faison pulled up to the gates and the three of them got out. Jeff ran inside and called for Lester to follow.

"What exactly are we looking for, Jeffrey?" Lester asked, his voice tight.

"Inspiration. And I think we just found the motherlode," Jeff smiled as he pointed to several items at the top of one of the many heaps of junk.

"Well?" Faison asked, catching up to them.

"We need to take some of this stuff with us," Jeff instructed. "I have an idea."

Lester gently shoved Faison. "You heard the man; now _mush_!"

* * *

 _I have lost my mind. Completely and totally,_ Faison thought to himself as he, Jeff, and Lester climbed up the side of the house using a ladder-among many of the things they confiscated at the junkyard-and then through a hole in the roof to hide up in the rafters. From where they were perched, they could see Blackwell pacing back and forth in the room and Gloria, tied to a chair a few feet away, not moving. Thankfully, the building had a very high ceiling so it would be even harder for Blackwell to see them.

"Is she-is she alive?" Lester whispered frantically.

As if on cue, Gloria's head moved and she made a moaning noise. _Thank God,_ Faison thought with relief.

"It's about time you woke up," Blackwell said in his usual smug manner. "Now that I have your attention, you are going to tell me what I want to know. Once and for all. Or else."

"Or else what? You'll lie to me again? I'm not telling you a thing. Not a damn thing!" she shouted back.

"You tell 'im," Jeff whispered.

Faison instantly flinched as Blackwell slapped her, but had to hold up a hand to Lester, who looked ready to attack right then. "Just get ready for...whatever you guys are going to do," he told them, putting their minds on the task at hand.

"Right," Jeff nodded. "You ready to do this, Lester?"

Lester nodded back. "I was born ready."

Down below, things were getting tense. "I don't think you understand. You either tell me what that microchip does or I push a button on this device," Blackwell showed her a pen sized detonator for effect, "and it will set off a timer for a bomb to go off. Blowing this place sky high with you inside. Now tell me what the microchip _does_ , you little bit-"

"Ca- _caw_! Ca- _caw_!"

Blackwell looked around. "What was that?"

"Ca- _caw_!"

Faison watched as Lester held a bag of down feathers from an old pillow and let a couple of them fall gracefully down while Jeff continued his bird call.

"I don't _know_ anything!" Gloria cried, ignoring the distraction. "Now _please_ just let me go so I-"

Suddenly, a bright light shone down right on Blackwell. Faison fought back a chuckle as Blackwell tried to look upwards but was blinded from the brightness. Nothing like finding an old flashlight with mega wattage and a semi-decent battery. Now Gloria was trying to look up as well, but she was unable to see.

"Turn on the fan, Jeffrey," Lester whispered, nodding to a battery-operated fan in the bag with the other 'goods'.

Jeff turned on the fan as Lester released the rest of the feathers, causing a whirlwind of fluff reigning down upon Gloria and Blackwell.

"What in the hell is going _on_ up there?" Blackwell demanded, still blinded by the light.

"It's called an ambush, boss," Faison cried as he and Lester pulled out a large plastic net and expertly dropped it on Blackwell, causing him to fall in a tangled heap.

"What the-? Faison, I'll get you for this!" Blackwell hollered, writhing around on the floor as feathers and the net enveloped him.

Faison then quickly slid down one of the columns and jumped onto Blackwell, fighting him as Jeff and Lester quickly made their way down.

"And here you thought you could have fun without us," Lester teased Gloria as he untied her.

"Are you alright?" Jeff asked.

Gloria stood up and touched her head gingerly. "Yeah. My head is sore. How did you guys find me?"

Lester nodded towards Faison, who was still fighting with Blackwell through the net. "Bang Bang Maxwell Silver Hair grew a conscience and brought us here," he explained, referencing Faison's silver-white hair.

"It's pre-mature grey!" Faison grunted. "I'm not happy about it!"

"Well, come on; we gotta get out of here!" Gloria told them. "I don't think he pressed the timer on the bomb, thank God."

Faison was still wrestling with Blackwell and managed to elude a punch before he attempted one of his one. "Come on. Let's get you up and out of here so the police can handle you. Oh; and I quit, by the way. You are psychotic." He reached over and grabbed what he thought was Blackwell's shirt to pull him up, but his hand hit something in his pocket and Faison gasped as he heard a rhythmic beeping. "Uh-oh," he murmered, realizing he had accidentally touched the timer for the bomb. _I probably should tell them this place is gonna blow now, but I don't have it in me. We're leaving, anyway,_ he rationalized before he dragged a still netted and feathered Blackwell towards the door.

* * *

Lester knew they should get out of there as quickly as possible, but he could also tell that Gloria was still a little unstable from being hit in the head and slapped. "Are you sure you're alright?"

Gloria bit her lip. "Yeah. That jerk lied to me. He told me he kidnapped my foster parents. I shoulda known it was a trap. Still asking about the chip and what it does."

"We did pretty good, huh?" Jeff asked, puffing his chest out slightly.

"You guys were amazing," she giggled. "Thank you."

"See, Gloria? It's okay to let someone else save you."

Both Gloria and Lester looked at Jeff. How could his ne'er sober friend occasionally say the most profound and...sobering things?

"You mean-," she started.

"We accidentally saw the newspaper clipping about what your father-foster father-said," Lester interrupted. "No offense, but he's as big of a moron as Emmett."

Gloria smiled, her cheeks flushing ever-so-slightly. "Well, come on. Let's get the hell out of here."

"You don't have to tell me twice," Jeff nodded, putting his arm around her and walking out the door.

Lester looked around the area one last time before turning to leave. As he did, however, his leg hit a nearby table and one of the lit candelabras tipped over, falling to the floor and instantly catching one of the newspaper pages lying nearby on fire. "Oh no. Oh, God _no_!" he cried as the flames began to grow higher and more intense. "J-Jeff? Gloria?" he called out, but they were already gone. "Oh, God. Don't leave me! _Please don't leave me_!" he screamed, tears streaming down his face as the black smoke and orange flames drew nearer. _I'm going to die. I saved the girl, but now I'm going to die,_ he thought, terrified. _Please don't let me die like this. Please..._


	17. Chapter 17

Chuck jumped out of the car as soon as Sarah and Casey pulled up to take Blackwell in. They had just come back from a mission when General Beckman had alerted them of the situation. For once, he wished his flashing ability wasn't just for CIA and government resources. If he could have flashed and saw that Gloria was in trouble, he could have arrived sooner to help. But as he looked at Blackwell, who was being cut out of a giant plastic net and looked as if he was attacked by geese, he realized that maybe this wasn't a job cut out for him after all.

"Is Gloria alright?" Chuck asked Sarah.

"They should be coming out any second. Apparently, Jeff and Lester helped to rescue her," she replied with a nod.

"Jeff and Lester? How did they-" Chuck began.

"I told them," Faison's voice cut in. "When I found out about Blackwell's plan, I couldn't let him go through with it. I drove them here and they came up with a very unorthodox-yet effective-plan to distract Blackwell and rescue Gloria."

"Well, glad you did the right thing, but you're still in big trouble," Sarah responded.

"Look! There they are!" Chuck shouted as he saw Jeff and Gloria exit the building and he quickly ran over to them. "Gloria! Thank God you're okay."

"I am. Thanks to Jeff and Lester here," she smiled, looking over at Jeff. "Wait. Where's Lester?"

"He was right behind us," Jeff looked at Chuck.

Suddenly, a woman bystander gasped. "Oh my God!"

Chuck, Jeff, and Gloria turned back and saw that the building was now on _fire_!

"Lester is still _inside_?" Chuck asked, running his hand through his hair.

"Not fire; anything but fire," Gloria whispered, shaking.

"What are we gonna do?" Jeff cried out, getting upset himself.

Before Chuck could tell his legs to start running, however, he saw Gloria squeeze Jeff's hand before she dashed toward the building! "Gloria!"

"She can't go in there; she's afraid of fire!" Jeff and Chuck shouted in unison before looking at each other. "You _know_?"

"It gets worse," Faison exclaimed, his voice panicked. "The bomb has been set to go off!"

Chuck felt faint. He couldn't believe Gloria would run into a burning building after all the nightmares and the panic attacks she had during _her_ experience.

Suddenly, Casey placed a hand on Chuck's shoulder before he could take off. "She can do this. She's stronger than you think."

"But she-" Chuck began but Casey cut him off.

"She'll be fine. Just can't believe she's risking her neck to save Patel."

* * *

Gloria pushed every negative or scary thought from her mind as she entered the building. Even as the smoke and heat washed over her, she only allowed herself to think about Lester: how he helped ambush Blackwell, his instant one-liners, how he stalked her on her first day, his girlie scream during the car chase, and even how fast his heart was beating when they danced. Kneeling on the floor and crawling through the blackness, she called out to him. "Lester! Lester, where are you? Can you hear me?"

"G-Gloria? What are you-?" a faint, hoarse voice replied.

"I'm here, Lester. I won't let anything happen to you. If you can see me, take my hand," she shakily extended her hand up to where the voice seemed to come from.

"I-I can't. I'm s-sc-scared," he sobbed.

"We don't have _time_ to be scared. Just grab my hand. I won't let you go," she promised, coughing from the smoke.

She waited for a few seconds until she saw a shaky and soot-stained arm reach out. As soon as she could, she reached up and grabbed it tightly. "I got you. Get low to the ground and we'll run out together, okay?"

"Why are you helping me?" he asked as he did as he was told.

"Because I can't lose you; I _won't_ lose you," she responded as they exited the building. They had only gotten halfway to the crowd that had gathered around before the building exploded behind them, sending them crashing forward to the ground. The last thing Gloria remembered was smiling at Lester and gently squeezing his hand.

* * *

"Gloria?" Jeff asked, running over to where a couple of EMTs were loading her into the back of the ambulance.

"She'll be okay. Just a head injury, some smoke inhalation and the blast stunned her a bit. They're gonna take her to the hospital just for precautionary measures," Casey told him. "Chuck said he'd follow the ambulance to the hospital. How's Patel?"

Jeff looked over to see Lester waving off another EMT who was trying to look him over. He was sitting on the ground, a towel over his shoulder and a cup of water. His face, arms, and clothing were covered mostly in soot and slightly burned. Without another word, he quickly walked over to Lester. "What happened?"

"What do you _think_ happened? I was trapped in a burning building with a ticking time bomb. I-I just-she-I don't get it."

"You sure you don't need to go to the hospital?"

"How's Gloria? Is she okay?" Lester asked, ignoring Jeff's concern for him.

"I think she'll be alright. Good thing she was kidnapped or else you could've _died_."

Lester looked up at him, eyebrow raised. "Yeah. Good thing," he replied sarcastically. "I hope they lock that crazed maniac Blackwell up and swallow the damn key."

"The government hauled him off a little while ago. At least I _think_ it was the government. They had suits like the government," Jeff scratched his head. "They took Faison in for questioning but I don't think he's in as much trouble since he helped us."

"Yeah," Lester said, looking off in the distance, obviously not paying attention. "She said she couldn't lose me. She _wouldn't_ lose me..." he mumbled, his voice trailing off.

Jeff sat down beside him, concern for his friend. He had never seen him so close to death and so detatched before. "Les? Are you okay?"

Finally, Lester sighed. "No, Jeffrey; I'm not. I'm _terrified_."

"Scared of what? The building's gone. And boy, did it blow sky high. You should've seen it...oh, wait; you did."

"I'm terrified because of your sister. Jeff...I-I'm in...I'm in love with Gloria. I'm in love with a real woman for the first time in my life and I'm scared to death."

"Wow. That's deep. Does that mean you are going to break things off with Cynthia, the Invisible Victoria's Secret model?" Jeff asked.

"I'll have to. If I lie to her, she'll see right through me," Lester replied, a small grin coming over his face before turning serious again. "Jeff, I need your help with something. Something big."

"Lester, the monkey isn't coming back. I tried-,"Jeff began.

"Not with _that_. This is completely different."

"Okay. I'll help you. That's what friends are for," Jeff nodded. "But Les?"

"What is it?"

"What are you going to do if Gloria doesn't feel the same way?"

"That's just it. I know she doesn't. She just told me what I wanted to hear. She does not feel the same way about me. And that is what hurts more than anything. Even being burned on my testicles."

"You got burned on your-?" Jeff looked down.

"Perhaps, and no; you cannot check!"

* * *

Gloria opened her eyes and slowly looked around. "Ohhh...my head," she groaned, realizing she was still in the hospital.

"Yeah, getting hit in the head with a gun'll do that. Or so I've been told," Morgan's voice chuckled softly from across the room.

"Morgan? What time is it?"

"It's about noon. Almost twenty-four hours since your act of heroism. That was pretty fantastic, running in there and saving Lester like that. Guess the roles were reversed this time, though, in a way. You went from being the rescuee to _rescuer_."

"Oh, yeah. H-how is Lester? Was he badly hurt?" she asked, trying to sit up.

"He has a few burns, but nothing too bad. Jeff finally talked him into getting checked out. I think he was still a little freaked out by what happened."

Gloria sighed, recalling when she had been rescued by Chuck. "At least he didn't have panic attacks and couldn't speak for about two weeks. I had to take that medal of dishonor."

"Hey; don't beat yourself up about it. It was a traumatic experience. Anyway, you just missed Chuck. Jeff and Lester were here, too, but Lester refused to leave until the nurses literally had security throw him out. I've never seen Lester act so...concerned for another human being before. You've changed him, Gloria. He acts so...different since you've been here. Oh, which reminds me..."

Gloria looked as Morgan dug out a small box from his pants pocket. "Lester wanted to give this to you personally but since security was too tight for him to get back in, he asked that I deliver it to you. So, here ya go," he explained, handing the white box wrapped in a purple ribbon to her. "Sorry the ribbon got a little smushed up in my pocket. Anyway, the doc says you'll be out of here later today, so I'll let you rest. See you at work."

Gloria opened her mouth to tell Morgan he didn't have to go, but he was already out of the door. Looking down at the box, she carefully untied the ribbon and opened it. Inside, there was a note and a small velvet bag. She opened the note and read it: _Gloria, I had to do this. I_ wanted _to do this earlier, but the timing just felt right with what's happened. Feel better soon and thanks for saving me. Even thought I didn't deserve it... Lester. P.S. Did you mean what you said?_

Placing the note aside, she opened the small velvet bag and gasped when she pulled out what was inside: her amethyst necklace! Tears ran down her cheeks as she carefully put it on and rubbed her fingers over the stone.

 _You've changed him, Gloria. He acts so...different since you've been here,_ she replayed Morgan's words over and over in her mind.

Feeling her eyes get heavy as she continued to play with the necklace, a smile came over her face as she realized how excited she was to go back to work again and thank Lester personally.


	18. Chapter 18

"I found this huge package on our doorstep. I opened it up and this young woman was inside," Chuck announced as he came inside the house with Gloria. "Weird, huh?"

"Oh, Gloria, I'm so glad you're okay!" Ellie rushed over to give her a hug. "Don't you ever scare us like that again, you got it?"

"I'll do my best," she replied before receiving a hug from Captain Awesome.

"Pretty impressive heroics, there, Gloria," he told her. "Not everyone would run back into a burning building like that."

Chuck exchanged a knowing look with Gloria and smiled. He was glad he could get everyone together for a last-minute welcoming party. Sarah and Casey were there, as well as Morgan, Jeff, and Lester. Chuck even took note that Casey was smiling. He _knew_ the big lug had a soft spot for her.

"How did you get your necklace back?" Sarah suddenly asked Gloria, causing everyone in the room to grow quiet.

"Lester gave it back to me. When I was at the hospital, Morgan gave me a present from him. Inside was the necklace," she replied, her hands involuntarily rubbing the stone.

"Wait; _Lester_ gave it back to you?" Ellie repeated, looking around. "Speaking of which, where _is_ Lester? And Jeff? They'd better not be in my bedroom again or I will ship them directly to Timbuktu."

Suddenly, Jeff appeared at the top of the stairs. "Lester says he'll be down in a minute. He's, um...not feeling well right now."

"We have some Mylanta if he needs-," Chuck began but Gloria cut him off.

"I'll go check on him," she said. "Jeff, why don't you come down and have a piece of cake?"

"Ooh, okay!" Jeff responded excitedly, running down to join everyone else.

Chuck looked over at Sarah and Morgan. "What do you suppose that was all about?"

"I'm not sure, Chuck, but Lester and Gloria are friends, and she _did_ save his life. Maybe he just is embarrassed that he had to be rescued by her."

"Yeah," Casey chimed in. "He and the other looney toon came to rescue Gloria and in the end, she had to rescue _him_. Maybe he's nursing whatever is left of his strange little man card."

"I don't think that's it. I think Lester is in love with Gloria and he's scared out of his mind," Morgan argued, taking a drink of his soda. "You guys didn't see him at the hospital, but I did. He was at her bedside, staring at her and he refused to leave when the nurse told him he needed to go. He was genuinely worried and scared for her and for the fact he is hopelessly in love with her."

Chuck turned to Morgan. "You're serious?"

Morgan nodded his head. "Yeah, buddy. Don't freak out, but I think Lester is trying to get up the nerve to tell Gloria how he feels. And as hard as that may be for any man, it's going to be ten _times_ that hard for _him_."

* * *

Lester was sitting on Chuck's bed when he heard a knock on the door. "Jeff, I _told_ you that I can't come down. Tell them I have a spastic colon or a herniated disc from bench-pressing."

"Why don't you tell them yourself?" Gloria's voice replied as she entered the room.

Lester looked up and audibly gasped before looking away again. "Gloria, I-"

"It's cool," she interrupted. "But before you think of any more creative excuses as to why you can't come downstairs, I have something I want to say to you: I meant it."

Suddenly, Lester stood up as the realization of what she said hit him. "You-you _meant_ it?"

Gloria nodded. "Every word. When I turned around and saw that you weren't there and realized you were trapped in the building, both my head and every muscle in my body told me to stay, except one: my heart. I couldn't lose you. Lester, you frustrate me so, but you have been someone that I just can't bear to lose. I've lost so many people in my life and I refuse to lose any more."

"Gloria, I-I-wow. I've never had anyone say that to me before. When you were in the hospital, I wanted to stay until you woke up. I wanted to say that I-thank you and that...no one has ever done anything like that for me before. You are the first person other than Jeff who has seen how I am and hasn't run away or wanted to hurt me."

"Oh, I never said I didn't want to hurt you," Gloria laughed. "But you made up for it when you returned my necklace. I just wish you could have given it to me personally."

Lester looked down. "Believe me, I wanted to. But those psychotic nurses threw me out and then had security keep me away from your room. I told Jeff to find a nurse's uniform but he said they were all too tall and curvaceous for my figure. Which by the way, was not only insulting, but a bit-"

Gloria walked over to him and smiled. "Lester? Shut up."

Lester closed his mouth and gave her a look but before he could think of anything else to say or do, Gloria gently pressed her lips against his. At first, his eyes grew wide with surprise, but he quickly embraced her back and closed his eyes, savoring the moment. He thought his heart would burst with happiness as he realized that she _did_ have feelings for him, too!

When Gloria pulled back, she smiled, her face just an inch from his. "I like you just the way you are, Lester."

"Oh, _mamacita_!" he cried before they kissed again, Lester having never felt so happy in his life as he did in that moment.

* * *

A few days later-and after the shock of Lester and Gloria as a couple wore off-, it was time for Buy More's huge sale. Hundreds of people gathered to save big bucks, as well as get in on the various door prizes and sweepstakes.

"Alright, guys," Big Mike sighed, looking at Jeff and Lester. "A promise is a promise. I promised that Jeffster could perform one song and I am a man of my word. Now get up there and make me proud, boys!"

"Proud won't even come close to how you'll feel," Jeff responded before he and Lester took the makeshift stage, causing Big Mike's brows to furrow.

"Bartowski, what have I done?" he muttered to Chuck, who was standing beside him.

"I guess we'll find out, big guy!" Morgan cut in. "You know what they're gonna play, Gloria?"

Gloria shrugged. "Something by Billy Joel or Elton John. I can't recall. Or maybe it was Fleetwood Mac..." she said, her voice trailing off.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we wanna thank you for coming out to the _Buy More_! And now, get ready to rock! I want to dedicate this song to my leading lady, Gloria Tipton, who is looking _smoking_ hot tonight!" Lester cried into the microphone, taking control of the stage.

Everyone turned to look at Gloria, who turned a shade of crimson but giggled at the attention.

Suddenly, Jeffster began playing an 80's ballad well known from the _Dirty Dancing_ soundtrack: "Hungry Eyes" by Eric Carmen.

Chuck looked at her as she mumbled something about the Lambada and covered her mouth with her hand as Lester poured his heart and soul into the lyrics. Jeff stood next to him, playing his keyboard and giving odd come hither looks to various women in the crowd.

Big Mike watched and Morgan handed him a handkerchief, not even looking at his boss. Big Mike instantly took it and blew his nose. "This song is beautiful. That boy is gonna get some lovin' tonight."

Chuck, Morgan, Casey, and Gloria all turned to him with various looks on their faces.

As soon as the song was over, scattered applause and awkward looks filled the shopping center.

"Thank you, Burbank and goodnight!" Lester called out.

"Lester Indira Golda Patel!" a female voice shouted sternly over the crowd.

"Uh-oh," Lester accidentally muttered into the microphone as Gloria walked on the stage.

"I cannot _believe_ that you would dedicate that song-or any song-to me," she began.

Lester opened his mouth, but only half syllables came out.

"I _loved_ it!" she suddenly smiled, giving him a huge kiss in front of everyone, who either gasped or applauded.

"Well, it's official; Gloria and Lester are really an item," Chuck stated, wide-eyed but smiling. "I just pray for Lester's sake that he doesn't hurt her."

"Cause you know he'll have hell to pay from Jeff, you, and myself?" Morgan asked.

"Well, yes, but that's not what I meant. If there is one thing I know about Gloria, it's that as sweet as she is, she also has a dark side. Lester will find that out if he does anything to make her upset."

"Trust me, I know, buddy. I still laugh when I think about her blackmailing Emmett with his animal porn addiction."

Chuck raised his eyebrow. "Animal porn addiction?"

Morgan laughed. "Yeah. In fact, I thought she mentioned something earlier about making good on her threat since Emmett teased her about being afraid of fire and all."

Suddenly, all of the television monitors turned on and an image of Emmett watching his computer filled the screens. "That's right, Mr. Hippo. Show her who's boss," Emmett was saying seductively in the video.

Chuck and Morgan looked at each other in horror. "Oh my God!"

" _Noooooo_!" Emmett screamed, his hands on his face as he realized what was happening.

As everyone was gasping, gagging, and mumbling, however, Jeff, Lester, and Gloria stood onstage, smiling proudly, high-fiving and hugging each other. Life couldn't get any sweeter than this.

THE END


End file.
